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What do i do about this???

my DH's "free" car has already cost us 2000 in repairs recently, and now needs another 1800, which we just dont have, and the mechanic even said it isnt worth it. So, we need to get another car for him to drive. Well, we already have the "family" car, and it is more than i ever wanted to pay for a car. So, we have looked into what we can afford (though sadly I was hoping to put any extra money into getting us a bigger apartment (5 people in a 2 bedroom just isnt working out so well)), and we cannot go over 150/ month for another car payment. DH got approved for 12000 for a car loan through the bank. I told him we should still look for a car tha is way under that.. something that is in good condition, etc... but we dont need anything fancy. It will be used just to get him to and from work. So, what does he do? He goes looking at a used Chrystler 300 today! WTF? He and I both know that is way over what we agreed on, but it is all he has been looking for online since we decided to start looking. He says "oh, Im just looking for fun", but then he really goes and drives one today...

Its his dream car. I understand he is going to try to get one, but he needs to be realistic. He is going to stretch this as far as he can, and I am not happy. We need some crappy used $5000 ford escort or something, ya know? Sure it would be great for him to get something really nice, but we simply cant afford it right now. We are barely scraping by. I wish we didnt even need a second car but we just do.

I dont even know what to say to him. I hate being the responsible one, but I am. He is repairing his bad credit, mine is great! This is one reason we have seperate bank accounts. Im surprised he got approved for a loan in the first place. I know he is not going to make the best decision, and I am going to be really mad, but if i pipe in and start being 'mommy' and dont let him get his dream car.. well, you know how guys are. I want to be able to trust him to make the right choice, and I know he really wants me to trust him... but I am so afraid this is going to go bad..

What can I do?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:57 PM on Mar. 6, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (3)
  • we needed a 2nd car and my hubby got a honda civic. you can get one with fairly low miles for around $5k and they run forever. i have seen them with 300k plus on them.

    Answer by newlife627 at 8:01 PM on Mar. 6, 2011

  • we needed a 2nd car and my hubby got a honda civic. you can get one with fairly low miles for around $5k and they run forever. i have seen them with 300k plus on them.

    I think her point is even though they are available that is not what he is aiming for.

    I have been in this situation, and been disappointed with his choice, also been in this situation and been pleasantly suprised. If it were me I would tell him the absolute price limit you are willing to go with, and then end the conversation with " if you go over that number I will know you value a car higher than you value me." Then sit back, stop nagging and see what he does, It could go either way, so I know youre nervous, but give him the ultimatum and find out what he really thinks.
    Good luck xxx

    Answer by myheartx4 at 8:07 PM on Mar. 6, 2011

  • my husband does this all the time. i hate it. sadly though as much as your going to have to do this you have no option but just to crush his dreams. you can't knowingly buy the car and then suffer and stress over the bad choice that was made. my husband is always looking into the account and thinks since there is money there it will last and that he can spend it today and expect it to grow back on trees the next day. maybe you could talk with his mother if she can convince him in a nice way that his family needs to come first before his dream car. i'm sick of the same situation. i'm sorry your in it and i'm sorry i'm in it. we have no choice when we have immature and very irresponsible men.

    Answer by melody77 at 8:46 PM on Mar. 6, 2011

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