Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

Advice: On how to behave.

I am an immigrant and my daughter has all American friend (classmate), they are much richer than us. They took my daughter to a play date yesterday- I brought her with a present (cosmetic bag to their daughter), my daughter stayed for hour and the half and they played nicely. I gave their parents box of candies and said thank you.

Today I took my daughter and their daughter to the play date. On this play date one other immigrant boy joined us. The kids played fine. Then I drove them home. When the American girl went out of the car she tripped and fell down, having a bloody scratch on her knee. She cried so loudly, her mom thought I killed her. She did not want to speak with me, just shut the door and left. I apologized, then called later to check how the girl is doing, yet her mom did not answer. I wrote her an e-mail, stating that kids had good time otherwise, but I feel that mom just hates me...

This is the same girl that bit my daughter recently. I did not tell anything to her mom, since my daughter decided to deal with this by herself. But because we immigrants, not rich I feel really, really scared for the whole situation. Any advise on what to do?

Answer Question

Asked by ganna04 at 11:44 PM on Mar. 6, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 14 (1,468 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • I would ignore the situation if I were you, you have already gone above and beyond the normal.

    Answer by truthteller0722 at 11:47 PM on Mar. 6, 2011

  • If they are classmates, I'm sure they would still be friends. Maybe after she calmed down she told her mother the truth. Kids have accidents all the time, that is normal. Wait a couple of days and see what your daughter says to her in class. Don't drill her though, if she wants to tell you she will. Despite what happened, I'm sure the teachers treat them equally.

    Answer by amessageofhope at 11:55 PM on Mar. 6, 2011

  • Hopefully she told her mom what happened. Just keep doing what you're doing. It's a good thing that you get children together to play. This is important for children.

    Answer by Kimimale at 11:56 PM on Mar. 6, 2011

  • If you have no other ties with this woman, let it go, things happen. Sometimes kids ( Girls) Can be a bit of a drama princess when they are tired or want extra attention. Don't look at it past that. Her Mom knows this already. Don't worry, you did something great, Just keep it movin' There will always be people who act like that. You just keep being the wonderful person that you are. Being an immigrant has nothing to do with who you are on the inside, from what I read, you were being the example of what you want you child to be. Good for you. Hatred for no reason, is really something else, you don't have time for that, now do you?.... of course not.:)

    Answer by Avitar at 12:17 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • Some people are just ignarant. It shouldn't matter how mouch money you have. You have done more then enough for them. You seem like a really nice person and if they can't like you for who you are then o well. You don't need to prove to anyone that ur a good mom.

    Answer by Kimberly71682 at 11:59 PM on Mar. 6, 2011

  • Well... school is completely different story, the teacher already treats them unequally. I don't know what her girl told her mom. Next week this is class outing in this house and I am very apprehensive on what happen and how they will treat us if we come...

    Comment by ganna04 (original poster) at 12:07 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • why should the fact that you are immigrants have any bearing, unless you are not legal? And if the girls parents have a problem with you not having as much money as they, that's their ignorant problem. Furthermore, you're judging a book by it's cover too...they may have 'a lot', but they may owe up to their eyebrows and be living paycheck to paycheck with loans and credit? We don't have as much money as some of our freinds, but they also owe on their house, cars, loans and high credit card debt, while we don't.

    as for child should be treated according to 'social status', i'd be up in arms in their face about that.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:18 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • Thanks guys. At the place where we are there are clear distinction between immigrants and Whites in a very white rich community. A lot of it reinforced by school, unfortunately. The mom wrote me that everything is fine and thanked for the time and so...Hopefully it will be fine.

    Comment by ganna04 (original poster) at 12:31 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • It sounds to me like these people are just really petty and you should keep your distance from them. Sad for your little girl, but some people are just jerks. :( Sorry this happened to you.

    Answer by KTMOM at 11:56 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • KTMOM, sadly indeed I feel you right. I will have to keep the distance, I am not going to take this girl to play date or allow one into their house. This is just to much.

    Comment by ganna04 (original poster) at 12:47 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.