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3 Bumps

It hurts more than....

I'm going through a divorce and most of my friends are married to HIS friends and slowly, as people started figuring out that I really AM serious about divorcing my husband, my friends stopped talking to me.
I have like 2 friends left....the rest have bailed on me and it hurts.
Friends are supposed to be there to be a shoulder to cry on or an ear when you just need to vent about things like divorce, but alas....my friends were only my friends as long as I stayed married to my husband.

How do I move on from this?
This hurts worse than deciding to divorce my husband.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:19 AM on Mar. 7, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (14)
  • You stay strong!  For them to leave you so easily means that they were never your friends to start with.  They don't deserve to be anyways.

    MrsHouston47302

    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 1:21 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • Ya the whole world who seemed to be with you will surely drift away; my dear it is a matter of convenience to them this way. But so what? That does not make you change your mind. Right? Only the pals who actually loved you would stay. It's your decision. Go ahead with that. You will be able to make such friends again. Don't feel hurt.....
    AnuMeha

    Answer by AnuMeha at 1:23 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • Awww I'm sorry that really sucks....but if they are going to leave you so easily they were never really your friends to begin with, I know that doesnt make the hurt go away but you just have to think...if they were going to stop talking to me because of this, eventually they were probably going to stop talking to you about something else. Keep your head up mama...you have a whole website of new potential friends here on CM =)
    Lucky209

    Answer by Lucky209 at 1:28 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • That is how it goes with every divorce, you do lose a lot of friends and people tend to take sides. Let them go and realize that you are far better off without those flakes!

    The 2 friends you have left are worth 100 of the fickle ones. Be glad that you have two good friends, that is more than some people have. And you are probably tired of hearing this, but time does change things. In time you will build more good friendships, but it will take some time. Just be strong!
    spottedpony

    Answer by spottedpony at 1:29 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • I think people drift away because you have less in common w/ ea other once divorced. Kind of like how you loose friends when you get married and then again when you have kids. I also think that your life gets a little to real and they don't know what to say/do. Hugs momma, it 's painful. Reach out to the ones still there and make some new friends too.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:35 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • I lost my whole entire group of friends during my divorce, even though I was leaving my abusive ex husband. Anyway, be grateful for the friends you do have (i'm not saying this in a snide way, i'm seriously saying be grateful) and slowly, but surely, you'll be able to move on. Eventually you'll make new friends and be glad that they didn't know you before, because they're a part of your new life. Good luck and stay strong.
    lexi8622

    Answer by lexi8622 at 1:35 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • I totally agree with Lucky209...and I am so sorry to hear about your friends being so "fair weather".
    We're here for you!


    group hug

    Missikat75

    Answer by Missikat75 at 1:36 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • If these people was your friends, they wouldn't abandon you like this. You are better than this ... go find some new friends who will stick by you no matter what!
    normasue2

    Answer by normasue2 at 1:37 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • I feel bad for you when you break up with someone people do talk sides a real friend would stay.god luck.
    Betutah

    Answer by Betutah at 2:19 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • I am sorry. I know how much it hurts. Really a divorce is a tornado on your life and you are left with nothing and you either have to start over from nothing or try extremely hard to rebuild. It sucks because my own mother stopped talking to me when I told her.
    Hatsumomo

    Answer by Hatsumomo at 2:40 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

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