Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Next Question, Please »
Answers / Life & Home / Relationships
2 Bumps

What should he do???

Ok ladies DH's best friend needs some help. He is 27 and has been divorced for about 7 months. (his ex cheated on him) He is one of those guys that is just well a "catch" He is really attractive, nice, funny, financially secure (and SMART with his money!) and ALL he wants is to find a woman to settle down with and have children...like he really wants kids before he is 30.  He has been doing the online dating thing and its not working out to well. He has been out with a few ladies and just hasn't connected. He doesn't go to church and says he doesn't want to meet a girl somewhere like a club or a bar because he doesn't really like going to clubs and bars. He keeps asking me where to meet a nice girl and also here is the one i need your help with lol....... He wants to know if he sees a woman that he thinks is cute somewhere like the grocery store or the mall or whatever HOW can he go up and try to talk to them? He says he feels like if he did that any normal girl would think it was weird...So I am really trying to help him...I feel like it would be awesome for DH and i to have some more "couple" friends also DH and i met in a REALLY weird way and i kinda feel like i didn't really do the "dating" thing so i am not much help. Thanks for looking ladies! The sooner he gets a girlfriend or a wife the better for me because then i get my hubby all to myself again (he has been over here A LOT since they split up!)

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:12 AM on Mar. 7, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • ah, bless his heart...he just wants what everybody wants..a partner. i would tell him to just be himself, talk easily with people when he meets them, and not treat every encounter as if it was going to be 'the one'..it won't be. but it will help his insecurity, and cause him to mature in his ability to have a conversation. conversation is where it all starts.
    maybe he's hinting for you/dh to help hook him up (not sexually). he obviously trusts you. meeting women in a place like a store isn't unheard of, but its not a guaranteed thing, either. he needs to become more comfortable talking to strange women, just talking. (you never know, one may ask him out!) suggest he go about his life doing what he loves..and if there's a chance women like doing those things, too, that'd be a good place to start to find someone with common interests: sports/golf/tennis?, community events, hobby stores, volunteering, etc.
    dullscissors

    Answer by dullscissors at 4:44 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • Friends of friends of friends & word of mouth, just to add to the excellent answer above :o)
    Twinminator

    Answer by Twinminator at 4:50 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • What he needs to do if he's really serious about meeting someone is take up a hobby or take some non-credit interest courses at the local college or community center, or otherwise get involved actively in something that he enjoys or is passionate about. Any woman he meets there not already shares at least one thing in common with him, but he would have a jumping off point to start conversation.
    So far as women at the store or the mall, he could simply ask their opinion about something he wants to buy, and smile at them. Kind of like "Hi, sorry to bother you, but I'm trying to decide between product A and product B. Which do you think is better." If she ignores him or is icy, move on. If she seems warm and receptive, engage her in a casual conversation.
    mandaday

    Answer by mandaday at 4:52 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • it all depend on what type of girl he wants. if he wantssomeone into sports go to those type of places where wemon like that will be.
    ryahzMommy

    Answer by ryahzMommy at 7:04 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • Why not bring him to some of your kids' sport events (if that applies, of course)? He could try the library, the park, just a smile and hi to someone he thinks is cute wherever he goes can start something.
    rio_burb

    Answer by rio_burb at 8:11 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • suggest he go about his life doing what he loves..and if there's a chance women like doing those things, too, that'd be a good place to start to find someone with common interests: sports/golf/tennis?, community events, hobby stores, volunteering, etc.


     You know whats funny I didn't think about that...He volunteers at after school events at the grade school where he works..I bet he could meet a lot of women there! Hmmmmm I guess what i need to do is help boost his self esteem. Its so funny to me because he is such a great guy but, has the lowest self esteem...I guess that can happen when your spouse cheats on you huh? So how about a new question lol...any advice on how i can help him build up his self esteem so maybe he can interact a little better with women he meets?
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 9:23 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
Answers / Life & Home / Relationships

Check out some of the top posts today in Groups: