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How many times do you have to tell a 10 year old something before it permeates his "sports/video game/friends/girls" brain?

banging head into wallMy 10 year old takes out the trash, EVERYDAY , for the last 2 years, I still have to tell him to tie the bags shut. When the trash can is full and the trash truck dumps the can when the bag isn't shut stuff falls out. I make him clean it up. EVERY WEEK for 2 years!!!!!


I have tried every consequence I can think of, i WANT him to think for himself, I want to not have to remind him everyday, I want ...


So the question is, See if you can think of something brilliant ... I have probably tried it (his is my 5th bio kid and #8 in the family), but I believe in many minds can come up with a solution!


Asked by pammomof9 at 11:12 AM on Mar. 7, 2011 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 17 (3,287 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Pam, you are a funny mom. My only suggestion is to stop having the conversation. Stop reminding him. Make him remind himself. When he gets home today, don't even say anything just point at the garbage in the street. It might now make any less work for him, but it will make less work for you. I have one who does exactly what is expected of him and one that needs reminding but does it happily once reminded. Then there is the one who wanted to debate why it was her job in the first place... Every kid is different. Some of them just come preprogrammed to drive you insane.

    Answer by LoveMyDog at 2:14 PM on Mar. 9, 2011

  • This is sort of like the question in the old Tootsie Pop commercial. The world may never know.

    Answer by gdiamante at 11:17 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • btw , this question was prompted by watching about 6 pieces of trash fall out when the trash truck was here a few minutes ago. The last thing I said to him as he walked out with the trash bag was "make sure that bag is tied tight" and was answered with "I will!"

    Comment by pammomof9 (original poster) at 11:21 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • Well I don't know if I would apply it for this because he is learning cause and effect. As long as you don't do it for him he is just creating more work for himself. I assume you have pointed this out.

    But for other things sports/video game/friends/girls" brain gets those things taken away until the behavior is corrected.

    Answer by Charis76 at 11:40 AM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • LOL! my poor little boy who's only REAL chore is taking a bag out of a can, tie it and walk it outside.

    1st off if he would do it right already I could start to have the 7 year old start doing it but I don't want him to think he is getting out of anything.
    2nd it really isnt that big of a deal I just looked out and saw the trash truck and it actually made me laugh because I had JUST reminded him before he left for school, he and i have this conversation every week and he will have to pick up the trash at the end of the driveway AGAIN ... silly boy!
    3rd I thought it was a fun topic to throw out there for other moms of preteens because we ALL have kids that make more work for themselves.
    4th my kids would NEVER even try to do a good job if doing a bad job meant getting out of it :0)

    Comment by pammomof9 (original poster) at 2:43 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • Well, as a broken record of a 9 year-old daughter this is reassuring.  Our issue is getting to school on time.  On time for school with home work done--whe can watch tv that night till bed time homework not done late for school no tv.  We just started this and are having moderate success so far.  The thing is we are older parents and something has to be done as this is taking the starch out of both of us. When I was growing up, my mother made a chore list for me my sister and brother.  My sister and I alternated days with dishes and laundry and our brother took out the trash.  I was 10, my sister was 8 and our brother was 5.  We did it, no questions asked, no allowance expected and no complaints (that lasted very long anyway!)   Guess it is a generation thing...


    Answer by SoBehindImAhead at 9:02 AM on Mar. 8, 2011

  • He's 10, lighten up. His goal in life is probably NOT to be a trash man. I don't know any 8 - 10 yr olds who tie the bag. YOU tie the bag and then he can do the chore he probably hates. I can't imagine anyone making a little kid do the same chore for 2 yrs. That's just wrong imo. At least we traded out chores.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:07 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • If you don't like the way something is done perhaps it's time you did it and quit badmouthing the little boy.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:08 PM on Mar. 7, 2011