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4 Bumps

Husband said-maybe you should get hotter-you're fat-every man cheats

What would you think or do about it? My friends husband said these things to her. She gained some weight-he called her fat-she's 8 months prego now and they went to a wedding together-and he said maybe you should get hotter-and they were talking about his uncle cheating on their aunt and he told her that every man cheats. He's emotional abusive to her, they are on their 2nd child and she needs advice but i am running out of things to say..

 
Ambie0526

Asked by Ambie0526 at 1:15 PM on Mar. 7, 2011 in Relationships

Level 16 (2,562 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • Well Id leave anyone who was in anyway abusive to me, kids or not, in fact I did. I deserve to be treated like a Queen by the man I choose to be with, and your friend should look at it that same way. She is a special person and no one on earth is like her since no two people are the same, and somewhere out there is a man who would treat her and her kids the right way. First she has to love herself enough to look in the mirror and tell herself she deserves nothing but the best and believe it. Once she does she will look at him as a foul human being and wont want him.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 1:17 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • There is only so much you CAN say. The rest unfortunately is up to her.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:16 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • First off, not every man cheats! Second of all, every pregnant woman gains weight, and she didn't get that way by herself. Thirdly, if he wants to see hot, she should show him hot, in the form of a fire built under his behind. Tell your friend she needs to get herself a copy and ready BOUNDARIES IN MARRIAGE by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend. Her dear husband needs a little lesson in reality!
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 1:18 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • The more I think about this the angrier I get at his ignorance. Most abusers project how they think of themselves on to others which means he thinks HE isn't hot and thinks all WOMEN cheat so he's afraid she'll cheat (which is probably why he keeps getting her pregnant). Being "hot" is mostly mental so it's about attitude. I wouldn't want to be hot with a man like that either. He's a dog and needs to be put on a leash in the backyard. I'm not telling her to leave him if she wants to stay but if she is going to make this man her life partner she needs to just laugh at his ignorance. If it won't get her hit I'd suggest she laugh in his face when he says absurd things like he just did. She can't control him but she can control how she reacts to his hurtful words. I'd laugh and walk away from him
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:24 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • I would think he was an exceedingly UNhot, FAT-headed, cheater-in-waiting, and I wouldn't tolerate it.
    misses_nick

    Answer by misses_nick at 1:17 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • I would smack the shit out of him and then leave. I don't care if I'm 8 month pregnant with baby 10 or not even pregnant my husband better never call me fat or tell me to get hotter. It's disrepectful.
    red_head_mommy2

    Answer by red_head_mommy2 at 1:18 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • Nothing you can do. She willingly chose to make another child with this vile man and until she decides to stand up for herself and quit taking the emotional and verbal abuse it will continue. I hope she will wake up so her children are not harmed by the very dysfunctional family they are growing up in.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:18 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • He's an idiot and I wouldn't take what an idiot said personally. His abusive words should have no value. Btw, I got hit on lots of times while pregnant. Some men are smart enough to see the beauty in a woman at all times. And for his information, no not ALL men cheat.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:19 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • I would think that, not only is he a pig and possibly looking for an "excuse" to cheat, but she should NOT tolerate that bull and let him know it is NOT ok.
    -AJ

    Answer by -AJ at 1:19 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • He's abusive and she needs to tell him that they need to start therapy or she's leaving.
    TARARENEE

    Answer by TARARENEE at 1:29 PM on Mar. 7, 2011