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"I can't do this!"

My daughter who is 2 1/2 is going through this phase, and says it all the time.
Is it normal?
Did your LO go through this, if so how lond did it last and how did you approach it?

Thanks :)

Answer Question

Asked by AddyRF at 5:59 PM on Mar. 7, 2011 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 5 (94 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • They do go through spells of that.. in fact, throughout their childhood they do that. You need to show them how to turn that into "YOU CAN DO ANYTHING". Show them... they may actually believe they can't. LOL!!

    Answer by m-avi at 6:02 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • Mine is now. I ask her why she can't do it. Then when she tells me why (or I don't know) I tell her she can and show her how.

    Answer by CraftingMama at 6:02 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • 1) allow extra time for everything... if you are not in a hurry you will be more likely to have the patients to wait until she does it herself

    2) break things down into smaller steps. In stead of telling her to brush her teeth, break it down when she says "I cant". first put the toothpaste on the brush, then brush the top teeth, then the lower, then the tongue...etc.

    3) give choices... when she says "I cant get dressed"... ask her do you want to put your top on first or your bottoms.  Dont even acknowledge the "I cant"

    4) make things fun.  "I cant put my toys away".... do you want to do it to music?  do you want to do it backwards (she has to walk backwards the whole time"? do you want to do it like a doggie?  be creative.


    but dont acknoldge the "I cant" just redirect by breaking it down, giving choices, and making it fun.


    Answer by sahlady at 6:06 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • If I ask why she just says she can't. I let her know she can and to try again. When she does succeed I give her lots of praise and tell her good job. I hope this phase ends soon, because I don't like hearing those words come out of her mouth

    Comment by AddyRF (original poster) at 6:08 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • My son doesn't say it, he just grabs my hand and tries to get me to do it for him. Even though he's very capable of doing it himself.
    I just try to encourage him to do it himself. He usually ends up having a fit, because he wants me to do it.
    It's very normal. A lot of children second guess their abilities, but it's important not to let them fall into the low confidence cycle. Encourage them to do it and try to get them to do it as often as you can.

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 7:36 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

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