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What should I do?

My husband has a difficult time with owning up to his mistakes. If he does something wrong he will find every reason in the book as to why it was not his fault. It irritates me sometimes because it is not setting a good example for the kids but I don't know what to do. He has been this way his entire life and I should also add that he has been diagnosed with adult ADHD.

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mamacam7

Asked by mamacam7 at 11:22 PM on Mar. 7, 2011 in Relationships

Level 6 (149 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • OK, so he's been diagnosed for ADD/ADHD. Is he being treated for it? That would be a great place to begin.
    specialwingz

    Answer by specialwingz at 11:25 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • Yes he takes adderall...it helps with his sleeping but there are alot of things that it doesn't help with but he has been taking it since he was about 17 and he is 31 now so I assume that it is the medicine that his doctor feels best suits him.
    mamacam7

    Comment by mamacam7 (original poster) at 11:27 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • Well my DH doesn't like admitting when hes wrong either, but I just set him straight sometimes & hes speachless. When they think they don't do anything wrong we have to remind them they're not perfect. :)
    MomofSteel

    Answer by MomofSteel at 11:28 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • You might wanna try Vyvanse. Ask his doctor about it. It is geared more towards adult needs. It is an extended release that lasts a good 16 hours. An adult's world doesn't end at the end of the work day like a kid's does on a school day. My 18 yr old twin boys have Acute Genetic ADHD. Their doctor took them off Adderall as they outgrew it at 17, and put them on Vyvanse. It is our miracle drug! My boys would be more than happy to tell you how well it works for them.
    specialwingz

    Answer by specialwingz at 11:31 PM on Mar. 7, 2011

  • ADHD has absolutely nothing with him not being able to own up to his mistakes. Just let's make that clear.
    Him not being able to own up to his mistakes has to do with him outside of his ADHD.
    My older sister had ADHD and whereas sometimes she would stand on being right even when she wasn't, she definately didn't have an issue with owning up to being wrong when she realized she was. ADHD doesn't effect your ability to reason or be rational.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 12:09 AM on Mar. 8, 2011

  • Jazz...ADHD can ABSOLUTELY have everything to do with it!! ADHD affects how a person focuses on things (among so many other issues). Actually, this is one of the ways I can tell when my boys are outgrowning their meds. They become obstinant, defiant, only they are right, everyone else is wrong, and altogether are unable to get out of the dark cloud and see the clear skies. ADHD definitely affects your ability to reason & be rational as the brain shifts into overload and cannot sort out the issues. Once their meds are tweaked, they become reasonable, rational, and not so angry young men again. I've dealt with this for 14 of my boys' 18 yrs. And, have done extensive research in brain issues due to the ADHD & an ex who suffered from TBI. When someone suffers from a brain issue it compounds any other underlying issues as the brain has a tough time sorting them out & the person becomes overly anxious & reactive.
    specialwingz

    Answer by specialwingz at 9:59 AM on Mar. 8, 2011

  • Get rid of his ass !!!

    Just to put it BLUNTLY !!!!
    SissyAnn141

    Answer by SissyAnn141 at 3:58 AM on Mar. 9, 2011

  • That is absolutely not an option. I have been with him for almost 8 yrs and we have 4 kids together. I am still just as in love with him as I was when we first met! I am not going to leave my kids without a father because he has a problem he has beeen dealing with his whole life! I asked for suggestions basically on how I could talk to him I guess although I should have been more specific.
    mamacam7

    Comment by mamacam7 (original poster) at 4:32 AM on Mar. 9, 2011

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