Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How would it make you feel if your mom said this to you?

My mom agreed that she would help me out cooking for Thanksgiving, But today she called and said she didn't want to cook fer people she didn't like or know(My dad, and my Husbands Family) So I told her if she was going to act like a Kid I didn't want her to come. What would you have said? Did I over-react or did she?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 4:14 PM on Nov. 22, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • I think she was out of line. It's Thanksgiving! A time to be THANKFUL, not selfish. Did she think she could tell you that she didn't want to cook for these people (spend her money and food on these people) and still expect to come for a free meal? I agree with what you said/did. If she can grow up and put on her big girl panties and contribute to the dinner, then she is welcome...providing that she be civil to these people that she "doesn't like/know."

    I hope you can enjoy your holiday.
    scrapbookmylife

    Answer by scrapbookmylife at 4:20 PM on Nov. 22, 2008

  • wow, sorry your mom is being a hag...you probably dont want her to help...when people cook with malice in their heart it comes out in the food, cooking should only be done for love of people or love of food...if she cant be civil, she dont need to cook!

    shivasgirl

    Answer by shivasgirl at 4:53 PM on Nov. 22, 2008

  • Shes being a child. Tell her thats fine you will do the cooking and she can come and sit at the childs table.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:52 PM on Nov. 22, 2008

  • I would have said the same thing, her behavior was terrible and she needs to know it and pay the price. Besides, if she feels that way, she might only start trouble and ruin Thanksgiving for you and your guests.
    RenaeMom3277

    Answer by RenaeMom3277 at 6:45 PM on Nov. 22, 2008

  • I would so put her ass at the kids table this year!
    TheDragn01

    Answer by TheDragn01 at 7:53 PM on Nov. 22, 2008

  • I would have reacted the same way you did, and agree with cm08. I would tell her I am sorry she feels that way, but we will all miss her and that I love her.
    Aprilmorgans

    Answer by Aprilmorgans at 8:45 PM on Nov. 22, 2008

  • You both over reacted. You overreacted to her stating her opinion. That may be how she was feeling and you know what? She is entitled to that. You are also enitiled to your feeling. However, Thanksgiving is supposed to be bigger than that.
    (It is supposed to be equal emotional torture for all involved. No, just kidding.) But that is how it feels at times isn't it? And you are trying to make a nice dinner for everyone so *EVERYONE* has a decent and happy time. Can you explain that to her, your feelings I mean, not how to behave.
    SusieD250

    Answer by SusieD250 at 10:16 PM on Nov. 22, 2008

  • I think she went over the line. if she doesn't like the in-laws then maybe she should not be there. i'm sorry to hear that. i hope she realizes what she said was wrong.
    PinkRose282

    Answer by PinkRose282 at 12:51 AM on Nov. 23, 2008

  • I do think it is perfectly valid to be upset that someone so close would say they'll help you, then back out because they don't like/know the people coming. From this perspective, it does sound like she mostly offered help for the sake of having offered, rather than because she genuinely wanted to. I would have told her if she didn't think she was going to make it to dinner, then that's all she needed to say, but I was sorry she felt that way.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:14 PM on Nov. 23, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN