I am trying really hard to not be like one of those moms that fights all their children's battles for them. This is a new chapter in my life, in that my eldest is in kindergarten, and I have never had to deal with anything like this before. So I am finding it hard to gauge when it is appropriate to step in and help DS with any problems he may have at school.
Here is the problem. Since the very beginning of school, DS has had a problem with this one student in his class. Just about everyday, I have heard my son say, this kid has been calling him a loser, ugly, fat ect. It's not that he is telling on him, but rather he has been asking me if it's true. We talk about it, I tell him to ignore it and that this kid might be feeling bad about himself, yada yada. I try my best to tell him he is none of those things.
This kid has also, had another student hold DS arms, so that he can punch my DS in the chest. He tripped DS down the stairs. And now he is telling other kids that DS is disgusting and for no one to play with him. I am really getting tired of having to talk with DS just about everyday about this kid.
I have talked to his teacher before, when this kid started to get physical with DS... She assured me she has it under control, and that she talks to the students about bullying and how to be nice. Yet when I ask what the teacher does when this other kid does these things, DS he tells me nothing. She just tells DS to go somewhere else. The thing is this kid will fllow DS. To me it does not seem like the typical kid picking on another kid, it feels like it has crossed the line into harassment. Especially since he is telling the other kids to pick on DS and basically rallying them to stop being friends with DS. Which DS has lost 3 friends already because of this other little boy.
This has effected DS self esteem now, he seems sad. He will come home, and just seem bummed. He no longer wants to go to school. This is odd, because DS loves school. I don't know what I should do. I don't want to step in if I shouldn't. But right now, I am not sure if I shouldn't, since it seems to be a little excessive and it really seems like DS is being effected by this.
I tell DS how wonderful he is every single day. I do my best to boost DS self esteem. I have always done this, even before he started school. I have worked really hard since DS was a tot, to let him know that he is a great child and that he is smart, funny and handsome. Now it seems like this kid at school is just set out to destroy all of this, that I have told my Ds. I am having a hard time distinguishing, whether or not my feelings are that of an over protective mother, or if they are legit and that maybe I should step in. What would you do?
Answer by gemgem at 5:20 PM on Mar. 9, 2011
Answer by aeneva at 5:34 PM on Mar. 9, 2011
Answer by merandaobrien at 5:37 PM on Mar. 9, 2011
Answer by zperez0809 at 5:37 PM on Mar. 9, 2011
Answer by gemgem at 5:44 PM on Mar. 9, 2011
I was "bullied" (see torture) by my classmates from the 4th grade all the way through high school. To this day (I'll be 30 next month) I wish someone had stepped in and protected me. All I ever heard was to try and act like a duck and let it all roll off my back. Sticks and stones may break bones; they heal. The problems left over from the words last a life time. PLEASE step in and protect your son. No matter what he says now he will be a better person knowing that Mom is in his corner when things get to be too much. The teacher is NOT handling things and it's time to go to the principal, the superintendant or the cops to keep your son safe.
Answer by Rosehawk at 5:57 PM on Mar. 9, 2011