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my son is 23 years old. he does not go out, has no friends that I know of, does not drive (even though he has a car), does not work. on the other hand, he is kind, caring, helps around the house, respectful, non violent, and eccentric. he is vegetarian, shuns people, does not like talking to people most of the time, keeps to himself. when people meet him he is polite, respectful and they like him. he is very likeable but quiet. i've tried relentlessly to talk to him about it. i suspect he has some emotional issues going on because of his odd behavior. he is affectionate to my cat and dog. cleans house, picks up after himself. he almost dropped out of high school until i had him transferred to a high school for special need kids. he graduated and joined the marines. he lasted in the marines for 3 years out of a 5 year stint. he was discharged w/o honors for refusing to report to duty after being considered a model marine up to that point. he won't open up to me about his issues and won't agree to open up to anyone else. he's been home from marines now for 2 yrs. i dont know what to do. i love him and he is very intelligent but wasting his life away. he is home 24X7 and i honestly dont know why he isn't out of his mind by now. i asked him if he is addicted to online gaming - he claims he isn't. i asked him whaat he does all day, he says nothing really. i left my ex for emotional and physical abuse to me and i found out later to my kids. i offered up counseling but he refused to continue to go any more at 16. i offered now some career counseling but he doesn't want it either. i think he should see a psychiatrist but i know i'll never get him to go. im 54 and remind him i'm not here forever and he needs to get his independence. he doesnt seem to get it or to be concerned. meanwhile, his younger brother has been formally diagnosed with ADD the inattentive type and he refused all help/medicine offered. he turned to drugs and i couldn't handle that so he is now living with cousins in Maine. he was too young to remember his fathers behavior and now wants to live with him. finally, i have a "normal" daughter who is hoping to go to college next year, is an honor student, united way youth leader, works part time, and tries extremely hard to succeed. i work full time and have a home i purchased and am paying through the nose to keep all for my kids to give them a "stable" home close to schools and friends. so my hands are pretty full. all in all i still feel fortunate in so many other ways and am thankful for the things that are right about my life and family. it just hurts when i see my kids hurting. but i cant help someone that doesnt want the help and doesnt think they need the help. exhausted in connecticut...Answer Question
Answer by Anonymous at 8:43 PM on Mar. 9, 2011
Answer by tyfry7496 at 9:04 PM on Mar. 9, 2011
Answer by older at 7:36 AM on Mar. 10, 2011
If he wants to continue to live with you and not get a job to help you out...then I think there is no question that he needs to see a psychiatrist..not just a counsellor. His life is at stake and it is time for you to be proactive to help him get on the right track to take care of himself. Too bad he left the marines after such a good amount of time. I would have had him at the doctors right away. People can live reclusively if they choose to...if they are independently wealthy or, God forbid, start applying for disabilities and living off of taxpayers instead of Mom. Otherwise as kind and caring and wonderful around the house as he is he needs YOU more than ever to help him out of the nest.
Answer by notjustmom213 at 8:42 AM on Mar. 11, 2011
Answer by twinkletoes0408 at 7:56 PM on Mar. 13, 2011
Answer by tasches at 7:23 PM on Mar. 17, 2011
Answer by lilangilyn at 2:53 PM on Mar. 28, 2011