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3 Bumps

So who has a right to be mad here....

I was married to a man that I had 3 kids with ( 11, 9, 7 years old) ... we have remained good friends until this past year, we still get along I guess, but I am just so irritated about how he is with his new girlfriend that it is hard to even like him.

I of course kept his last name when we divorced, he never had a problem with this ( i really dont think he does now either) ... we were married for 8 years ( meaning I got use to having his last name all those years lol ) ...and of course I want the same last name as my children !

he has a new girlfriend who is making a huge stink about me still "using his name" ... SHE wants me to change it before they get married ( they arent engaged ) ...

She is so stupid, I am glad he doesnt take my children around her.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:26 PM on Mar. 9, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (17)
  • she sounds just plan dumb

    Answer by myboysRmyhero at 10:27 PM on Mar. 9, 2011

  • She's immature and petty. I don't think anyone has a right to be mad here. You were married to him for 8 years, and have children with him. It makes perfect sense that you would want to keep his name so that you have the same last name as your children. Her inability to understand that is a huge sign of her immaturity. A woman confident in her relationship would not feel at all threatened by the fact that you still have the same last name.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 10:29 PM on Mar. 9, 2011

  • A woman confident in her relationship would not feel at all threatened by the fact that you still have the same last name.

    this^^^^^^^^^ :)

    Answer by khf22 at 10:31 PM on Mar. 9, 2011

  • I guess I am not "mad" but I am very annoyed...

    Since I am still friends with most of his friends ( friends that we had when we were married) .... and of course she hangs out with them now I am always hearing about how she constantly talks about this... She even sat with one of my closest friends and asked her if she thought I was being selfish for keeping his name ( my friend said she told her " no but you are being dumb" and walked away)

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:32 PM on Mar. 9, 2011

  • I'd be annoyed she is being so stupid. It's your legal name and you have a right to it.

    My ex never had an issue with my keeping his last name for a couple of years, but I worked with someone who did. He would call her and say "we are divorced and you haven't changed your name yet. That's illegal, since we are not married anymore, you need to change your name" He actually called the police thinking he could get her arrested for using his last name.

    My ex did ask me about it once, but I told him that as of that point, it was less confusing for our son and his teachers if I kept my name the same. Besides, I like that name better than my maiden name. One of his now ex-girlfriends didn't like it and commented to me about how if they got married, she didn't want there to be TWO Mrs. O'Connors. I told her that O'Connor was a common enough name that I can guarentee that there would be more than the two of us.

    Answer by layh41407 at 10:35 PM on Mar. 9, 2011

  • It's a control issue on her part. Screw it, you've had that name for years, why on earth would anyone change it to satisfy some insecure woman? No.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 10:41 PM on Mar. 9, 2011

  • She sounds so silly. I would be amused.
    It reminds me of a some people in my community. Mr. L had an affair and left Mrs. L. She kept her name. It was hers for over 20 yrs. He married his side gig, and she also became Mrs. L. Every time the new Mrs. L mentioned her husband's name, she would also say "the man I sleep wtih." And we're talking people in their 50's and 60's! Just think of her saying that and seeing everyone roll their eyes when she does.

    Answer by balagan_imma at 10:47 PM on Mar. 9, 2011

  • This girl sounds insecure and immature. He needs to talk to her and get her panties out of that bunch.

    Answer by amybaby_19 at 10:50 PM on Mar. 9, 2011

  • She feels threatened by you, your history with your ex and the children you share with him.


    Answer by beeky at 10:56 PM on Mar. 9, 2011

  • She needs to really chill especially since they aren't even engaged and it's just a name what's her problem. Continue using your childrens last name which use to be yours and she needs to get over it or move on.
    I just got married almost 2 years ago and my Husbands ex wife still uses his last name and frankly I don't care...REALLY she has issues.

    Answer by dusty1962 at 11:08 PM on Mar. 9, 2011

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