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Has anyone been in a domestic violence case? adult content

i have been in one before, and it's all over now, the case was dropped since I have no history, but it still haunts me that there are people out there like that. It really hurts me to know that 50 percent of relationships are abusive, so i've heard. It's sad, and scary and horrible. I have been physically abused and now I don't trust the world as much as I used to. My partner says that I should just get over it. I have been to counseling for the domestic violence abuse and it doesn't seem to go away. Even with the guy I'm with, yes I love him, but it scares me to think that he will suddenly change. He is not abusive, but dramatic change has been present in my life for as long as I can remember. I have been to 12 schools in 12 years. I have a bipolar mother. and I may possibly be biploar (slightly, at times) myself. this makes me see that NOTHING LASTS FOREVER. this also influences me in my beliefs about marriage as well. most people (and i wish i were like most) think that marriage is healthy. I, on the other hand, that change is inevitable, so much, that I cannot promise MYSELF to one person BECAUSE i will change so much and BECAUSE i expect him to change so much. a person I once love turned on me, and it changed me forever. it was my own mom. then i had a supposed lover who then beat me (twice). that was enough for me. how can i trust anyone after that? im lucky to have the guy im with, but I am afraid of my future and am reluctant to have kids because of the pain they may endure. anyone relate??

 
Liz4Life

Asked by Liz4Life at 1:15 AM on Mar. 10, 2011 in Relationships

Level 17 (4,309 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • yep... but don't label ALL men bad . Give yourself a chance at happiness. a chance at real love. IF you need meds for this issue ... 1/2 bipolar GO TO THE DOCTOR... dont sit there and think the whole world is out to get you .... find away to fix this soyou can live doll.... good luck . Here if you need to chat..
    kkbird

    Answer by kkbird at 1:27 AM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • Go to support groups and try a new counselor...things will change and trust is possible. I'm terribly sorry about your case- mine lasted two years but went to trial and I'm very grateful. But I had ptsd b/c of it, which sounds like you may also. Msg me if you have any ques or just want someone to talk to, I'm more than willing to share my experience or help in any way. Moving on IS possible, remember that :)
    lexi8622

    Answer by lexi8622 at 2:06 PM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • It sounds like you have PTSD. Talk with your doctor.
    Busimommi

    Answer by Busimommi at 1:46 AM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • thank you, that was kind-hearted! i have a very loving father and brother (thank god) and i do love the person i am with for sure and am in love and attracted to...so i trust SOME people, but something in me though feels...precautious i would say. like im holding a shield with one hand even though it's not being held up. its almost like im in asubconcious self defense mode, to be sure I'm ready if anyone strikes. should I just let go and get stabbed in the back again? cuz it would make me stronger, yet it would also make me feel defensive again if anything WERE to happen. I want to let go. Even in the grocery store, I'll be walking and anyone who gets close, I literally stiffen up and prepare for a blow to the head. that is so unlikely and unrealistic but i just feel it Could happen. my past events haunt me and i guess im a walking scaredy cat. anyone have this?? im not a huge advocate of meds either...
    Liz4Life

    Comment by Liz4Life (original poster) at 1:49 AM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • oh ptsd, never thought of that, thanks
    Liz4Life

    Comment by Liz4Life (original poster) at 1:51 AM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • i will keep all of that in mind, i believe you that there is hope
    Liz4Life

    Comment by Liz4Life (original poster) at 3:51 PM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • You can overcome anything if you set your mind to it. I would try counseling or talking to your doctor. Wish you the best, hun.
    jspenny2705

    Answer by jspenny2705 at 8:02 PM on Mar. 10, 2011

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