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Making friends....

I am a very shy person. I have never been good at making friends, even if it is just online and not in person. How do I become better at it, or just how do I make friends? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

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rose81

Asked by rose81 at 8:10 PM on Mar. 10, 2011 in Relationships

Level 4 (32 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • If you have kids get involved with things they like. You can meet other moms into the same things or with kids the same age. I also volunteer at the food bank and met some people that way. Even if your shy you will make friends just by having some things in common.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 8:11 PM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • Thank you for the advice. I will have to try that.
    rose81

    Comment by rose81 (original poster) at 8:12 PM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • I am good at making frinds, but it is not easy to have frinds these days
    lelly1019

    Answer by lelly1019 at 8:22 PM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • When I was in hs, I was extremely, painfully shy. Now, I'm the exact opposite - I'm extremely outgoing. It did take time and practice though. First thing (for me at least - I do NOT mean this as ANY sort of bash on you) - is I realized that really, I needed to basically get over myself - I was afraid of talking to new people, etc because it basically boiled down to me being afraid to look stupid or like an idiot, and I decided that honestly, I wasn't that important to them that they were going to think that much about what I was doing or anything.

    Then, I set goals for myself - it might sound silly, but it worked for me - I made a point of talking to at least one new person every day - even if just a second or two - even something like saying "hi" or "crappy weather outside, huh" to the person in line with me at the store.

    I got involved in things, and talked to the people there, like a pp said.

    cont
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 8:28 PM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • taking baby steps will help. step out of your box and do something you normally wouldnt do. find someone you would be interested in having a conversation with, comment on what the person is wearing, and break the ice. once you have finished talking about that, introduce yourself. take cues from the other person. they might ask all the questions for you and get the ball rolling. set up a lil game for yourself. like "today i am going to strike up a conversation with 5 strangers" keep it at small talk. its hard once you release the flood gates, but if you keep it short and sweet chances are someone will want to keep talking. stay away from topics like religion, politics, relationships, and kids, unless they other person goes that way. you can add me too :) im more than willing to help, i am outgoing, social, and i study people on a regular basis
    Arretsmomma5

    Answer by Arretsmomma5 at 8:28 PM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • cont

    It was hard at first, and there were times that I did (and still do) look dumb, but over time I found it easier and easier to do, and I cared less and less about what strangers thought of me. I also realized that there were people who cared about what I had to say, and didn't hold it against me when I looked or acted foolish, and those were the people who were important in my life.

    Now, lol, my dh and kids say that I'll talk to anyone, and I've had a lot of people that I've talked to that have told me that they were glad that I did talk to them - because I was the only one who did (like a new neighbor, etc) - and we've become friends.

    A good book (even though it's a kids book - still, very cute) is Amelia Ellicotts Garden (good for kids who are shy)

    Good luck - I hope that you're able to make more friends soon :-)
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 8:32 PM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • Thank you for all the replies. I am going to have to try something, and hope it works.
    rose81

    Comment by rose81 (original poster) at 8:37 PM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • whatever type of friends you want to be around go to those type of places where those people are .
    ryahzMommy

    Answer by ryahzMommy at 9:23 PM on Mar. 10, 2011

  • Just be your self and people will like try to find people who have the same interest so you can have more common ground good luck:).
    Betutah

    Answer by Betutah at 1:26 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • Join some groups. These ladies are very friendly and helpful when you need it. They are also very supportive. You can contact me at any time. I am an open book and you can feel free to ask me anything. I have a shoulder to cry on if you need it, I have an ear to listen to if you need to vent, we can just chat, whatever you need.
    God Bless and Love ya,
    Billie Mae
    jesussaves58

    Answer by jesussaves58 at 9:09 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

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