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Im not sure what i should do...

i have posted on here before how my moms bf caused problems when me her and my so lived with him in a house. i called the cops on him bc he said he was going to beat my a** and he said my child is going to be born & b screwed up and talks crap about our whole family. so we (my mom me and my SO ) decided to move out together and get a place together and get her bf out of the picture. well its been about 2 weeks give or take since we moved out. and she is hanging out with him again and lies to me about it is driving his car etc. i feel extremely betrayed.

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Asked by KelsoBabeyy at 4:58 AM on Nov. 23, 2008 in Relationships

Level 2 (4 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • CONT
    he brings her down mentally talks crap about her grandkids and her whole family hes an alcoholic, hes pulled these stunts probably 10 times in the past but this time i really thought it was the last straw. and its not. i feel very hurt that she still wants to be in his life even after what he did to her family, me my daughter, my bf her other daughters their kids... what should i do? how should i handle the situation?
    i already told her how i felt about him and that i think it is very wrong, and messed up for her to continue to talk to him and hang around him with how he treats her and her family. idk what to do. were on the lease, and cant just dip out of it. i feel like shes going to stop living here and leave us with full rent. im so stressed out with this, i have a baby on the way i cant take this stress. what should i do about this situation? im sooo lost

    Answer by KelsoBabeyy at 5:00 AM on Nov. 23, 2008

  • Well, it is your Mom's life and SHE is the one that needs to see whats going on. Everytime you say something negative, she is going to keep digging in harder to stay with him. I hate to say it this way, but, its not her responsibility to pay for another place when you are on the lease. Thats one thing that you should have thought about first. Never count on anyone else but you, not others. You may not like the man, but, thats who your Mom has chosen, and there really isn't anything that YOU can do about it..You have to let her live her life and learn on her own. She has to do it. I am not saying she does this, but, if she ask for money, tell her NO,. I Know, its Mom, but, sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do!

    Answer by Kat122 at 5:51 AM on Nov. 23, 2008

  • Turn your eyes to your own life now and develop your job skills and interests. You can be there if your mother has bad times.

    Answer by Bmat at 8:22 AM on Nov. 23, 2008

  • It's an abusive relationship and many times the one being abused leaves then goes back even though they are given many opportuntities to leave the chaos and abuse. She could go back for many reasons. Most think they love them. However, they confuse love with control. You can't really do anything for her. It's her life and her decision. Many leave up to a dozen times before they stay away for good so just accept her decision and get on with your own life and let her figure out what she wants to do with her's. When she gets tired of his crap she'll leave again, maybe for good.

    Answer by admckenzie at 12:18 PM on Nov. 23, 2008

  • I don't condone what she has done,she should never let anything come in between you all's relationships. Bf was flat out bogus,disrespectful and showed a lack of character. You did right to move and stay away from it all. Mom is caught up in the rapture of love,she has a companion that you guys hate but she doesn't. You know it is easy to let one go when there is no intimate bond. Mom is doing her thang now,taking some BS at the same. She may be afraid of being lonely that's why she hasn't stood up more. Mom will see the circumstances after the infactuation period,then you guys will come to term.

    Answer by loriec at 2:55 PM on Nov. 23, 2008

  • It sucks, but it's your mom's life. The best you can do is be there for her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:07 PM on Nov. 23, 2008

  • my family is never going to come to terms with her relationship with him. she has said many times that she doesnt love him. hes an ass yeah its her life, but when she is choosing the guy that causes problems with her family, thats what i have a problem with. she spent the night there last night and as she is an adult. she is betraying her family. her family is who is always there for her. this guy has caused us to move so many times throughout my life. ive seen him many times drunk because he is an alcoholic and getting in my mothers face screaming at her degrading her. he said my daughter is going to be messed up when she is born. i called the cops on him because he said he was going to beat my ass and kick my ass. the cops escorted him out because of this. and the first post what do you mean her pay for another place when im on the lease? wwe are all on the lease, she is too?? i dont get what you are saying.

    Answer by KelsoBabeyy at 9:14 PM on Nov. 23, 2008

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