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3 Bumps

If a teen has bipolar or some kind of mental illness can they control themselves?

My daughter seems to get violent with me, disrepects her Aunt, her sibblings and people who won't fight her back.

When she is approached by kids she won't fight them back especially if they are the tought kids in the school, teachers she can control her temper and other authority figures.

When I talk to a teacher, counsler or anyone they are like she is a great student but only if she would do the work?
Is it more of a control thing or could she really have bi-polar? How do I fix it?


Asked by Anonymous at 11:11 AM on Mar. 11, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • Is her schoolwork suffering? Does she have many friends? These are usually the first signs of a struggle going on. For the most part girls are social in their pre-teen and teen years and make friends fairly easily. Children with mental illness have a hard time making and keeping friends. I have two children that have ADHD, one of them also suffers from depression. They are both on medication. It took a bit of time to find the right fit and dose for each of them, but once they got the right dose it made a world of difference.
    I disagree with those that say she behaves the way she does with you because she knows she can get away with it. I believe, from personal experience, that she struggles to keep control in public and i the real world, but feels safe at home to be herself. Your love is unconditional and you will not leave her. I hope that you are able to find an answer and peace for your family soon. Good Luck!

    Answer by catsmom1993 at 6:49 PM on Mar. 12, 2011

  • ANYONE with a mental illness can learn to control the symptoms. But the only way to find out what is going on is to get her evaluated by a professional.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:15 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • I think proper psychological and mental evaluation is needed to properly diagnose the situation. It could just be a behavior issue and not a mental disorder.

    Answer by MrsJStearns at 1:10 PM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • My son is bipolar and his teen years werent alot of fun. I would take her to the doctor and make sure she is properly diagnosed and goes to some counseling of some kind. Usually from there you can find out for sure if she is Bipolar. It also takes awhile to get the medications for it right. It took us 3-4 different combinations to get my son what he needed. But you need to start with the doctor and therapist, and then work with them.

    Answer by gemgem at 1:13 PM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • That's not really a good assessment for bi-polar disorder. My sister has similar issues when she was in junior high and high school. She was a great student when she would be at school, but she would take everything out on me (being the younger sibling I am) and my folks. It was like walking on egg shells with her around. It was a complete nightmare. But no, she doesn't have bi-polar disorder. She simply needs to be made very aware that that behavior will not be tolerated at home or at school.

    Once my sister was with a guy that wouldn't put up with that kind of crap she came around and became more accepting of things and less neurotic.

    Answer by meandrphoto at 11:15 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • What did you parents do.

    I feel like I am walking on egg shells and trying to protect her siblings.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:17 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • There could be a whole list of issues. Medical or otherwise. But,I see a key factor in your post..."seems to get violent with me, disrepects her Aunt, her sibblings and people who won't fight her back." She may be doing this to you & the family because she knows she will get away with it. It's not that you should FIGHT per se. But you should be having some serious discussions & set some consequences for these actions.

    Answer by specialwingz at 11:17 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • She could be bipolar or depressed or a combo of the two - I've been dealing with that same thing since I was about 14 or 15. Or, she might just be a teenager. I know my sister was like that as a teenager, and though she's depressed too, it's not that serious... but she was terrible as a teenager.
    If you can bring it up without a fight, maybe talk to her about trying out some bipolar meds/anti-depressants and see what happens.
    Good luck.

    Answer by AdensMama0308 at 11:18 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • Any mental health issue can cause poor judgement and lack of rationale, including defying authority, anger, outbursts, violence, etc. My boys have Acute Genetic ADHD. When their meds need tweaked or if they forget to take them, they get frustrated, angy & have a tough time with making good choices. And, on rare occasion, can get violent. But, I have managed to control that rather well. This is NOT ot say she has ADHD. I'm just saying that ANY mental issue can definitely affect how they act. Yes, certain things can be beyond their control. When the brain isn't "right" it mis-fires & TONS of isues can come from it.

    Answer by specialwingz at 11:21 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • My parents continued to walk on egg shells! They told me just to deal with it because that's "just how she is". For the sake of your other kids put her in her damn place!

    Answer by meandrphoto at 11:23 AM on Mar. 11, 2011