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8 Bumps

Ugh........idk anymore....

me and my bf will be togethr a year on may 15. We have been through alot already. Idk if it will last but i want it to, im so in love wiht him and want to spend the rest of my life with him. we took a break for a month back in dec, so not long ago, we ended up fighting to much. then we were perfect when we got back together, and now were fighting again, we amost broke up last nite. Im trying to be the best i can be, like say sweet things to him and do nice thinga for him. i only see him on weekends so its hard. But he doesnt say sweet things to me anymore, just that he loves me. Are we going to last? Were like falling apart and I want to save us from falling apart even more.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:17 AM on Mar. 11, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (14)
  • and wat does it mean when u bump a question? lol i never understod that.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:20 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • If you have to consciously work to not fall apart- it's probably a fight you're going to lose eventually. I tried it for 7 years once. Nothing worked. Didn't matter how much effort I put in to do nice things or say nice things or make his life easier. He was still a jerk and I resented him for taking advantage of me (which was my fault to begin with). It was a mess.
    meandrphoto

    Answer by meandrphoto at 11:21 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • It doesn't sound like it will work out. Especially if you only see eachother on weekends but you still end up fighting.
    MelissaAnn224

    Answer by MelissaAnn224 at 11:24 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • It all depends on what you guys are fighting about. is he cheating on you or just starting fights for now reason. I think the more we fight with them it kinda turns them off. my SO yous to always say the sweetest things to me but we got into a big fight not to long ago and now it isnt the same. We still spend time together and always have fun but those random I LOVE you text or miss you text have stopped. we do live together but that never stopped them before.
    MissChunkyLuv

    Answer by MissChunkyLuv at 11:26 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • Sounds like my relationship with my ex. 25+ years didn't change him. Glad to have that negativity out of my life. Can't stand waiting and wondering when the next fight will occur or what little thing might trigger it. It's no way to live. Life is WAY too short for that crap.

    As for the BUMP, it is just a way for other moms to help keep your question highlighted and at the top of the list for more to view.
    specialwingz

    Answer by specialwingz at 11:28 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • like he will randomly say i love you, but its not like it used to be.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:28 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • It sounds like you're working very hard on this relationship. However, remember a relationship is between two people who need to be making effort together, It doesn't sound like he's making the effort you are. Years before I married my husband I was in a relationship like this and I always found myself questioning me and what I was doing wrong. But that was my problem, I was doing all I could and he never did or even appreciated me. Now that I'm with my husband I truly realize what a genuine relationship should be. If you want to work it out you both have to work on it. Maybe even try counseling, because if he loves you that much he'll do whatever it takes too.
    -lovingliam-

    Answer by -lovingliam- at 11:34 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • Every relationship takes work, and lots of it....but it kind of sound like your working overtime and he's on vacation....For a relationship to work BOTH of you need to put in an equal amount of effort...think of it this way, If it does work out because of all the work YOUR putting in, don't you think that after awhile your going to start resenting him? He's just kicking back letting you be the relationship all by yourself..sounds lonely to me.
    Lucky209

    Answer by Lucky209 at 11:42 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • You have to remember that the sweet behavior you saw in the beginning was the result of the newness of the relationship and the infatuation that intoxicates people when they are first falling in love. The degree of the intensity changes once you are together more than 6 months. He still says he loves you and that is a very good sign. You might be going through a struggle as you rise to the next level of intimacy in your relationship. It doesn't mean you will break up. You are learning about each other and how you work through this period will tell if it will work out.
    kathyartist2007

    Answer by kathyartist2007 at 11:44 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

  • Maybe for most, that euphoric feeling fades. But, mine is still the sticky sweet gentle man he was from day 1. I can't keep track of the # of times we say "I love you" every day! He still opens ALL doors for me, still kisses me on the neck (& more ;-) )when I'm in the kitchen, brings me flowers "just because" & special occasions, surprises me with little gifts for no reason, oh, the list just goes on and on. We've been together for over 4 years. So, no, it doesn't necessarily fade. My ex, as I said, was terrible! Once the marriage cert was signed, he didn't believe he had to tell me he loved me or do anything for me. Wow! What a wonderful man I have now! Good riddance EX!!!
    specialwingz

    Answer by specialwingz at 11:52 AM on Mar. 11, 2011

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