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when is it okay to be selfish?

I am over 40 now and my youngest is now out of highschool.I was a stay at home mom most of my married life,I'm not even sure how unusual my marriage is...no communication,my husband drinks and becomes annoying but never violent...my bills are paid but we have separate accounts,I now work,.I feel like I would be more relaxed living alone...but on the other hand I don't want to be lonely....when I say my husband drinks I mean to the point where it is an issue a few times a month....I totally love my kids and enjoy being a mom but I also love to travel a lot and now I would like to spend some extended time in other countries....when is it okay to the your kids to handle thier own problems and just worry about my own agenda for a while

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:22 AM on Jul. 9, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (3)
  • well, is the youngest leaving for college? i wouldn't leave him/her with your dh if he drinks that much. or maybe your youngest can move in with a friend. i would take care of that then get the hell out! your wasting the rest of your life.
    SamsMom125

    Answer by SamsMom125 at 2:43 AM on Jul. 9, 2008

  • It's never too early to teach a child coping skills. Also, children are very observant and know what's up at home. If your youngest is out of high school then I believe it's high time that you thought of yourself. As soon as my youngest turned 18 I felt it was MY TIME. I've never regretted my decision. My kids are fine and all living their own life. They have learned to deal with their own problems. If they present them to me first I merely ask "so what are you going to do about it?" I put the ball back into their court and let them figure it out. I am supportive and give ideas but they have learned they are adults now and I have confidence in their ability to take over their own life. I have mine to live now! I am loving it too.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:14 AM on Jul. 9, 2008

  • you said your youngest is leaving for college? well, let one of your older ones play advisor and go on vacation alone for a while so you can clearly think what to do. i'd hate to see you throw away a marriage that could be fixed becaue you are frustrated and fed up with the hubby. have you tried to tell him how you feel about the drinking and etc?
    princezzmommie

    Answer by princezzmommie at 11:03 AM on Jul. 9, 2008

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