Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

What do you do when someone you care about becomes abusive alcholic?

Answer Question

Asked by Parka54 at 4:08 AM on Mar. 12, 2011 in Relationships

Level 12 (751 Credits)
Answers (16)
  • Force them to seek help. If AA meeting aren't doing the trick. Send them to rehab.

    Answer by TiffanieK at 4:09 AM on Mar. 12, 2011

  • Do not encourage the habit. Do not buy it, or have it on hand when they are around.


    Answer by louise2 at 5:45 AM on Mar. 12, 2011

  • along with what theladies have said you should stand by them. when people get that way they really need someone by there side (even if they fail to realize it)

    Answer by ryahzMommy at 5:59 AM on Mar. 12, 2011

  • I know that you can't force someone to get help if its not what they want, my sister has been an alcholic for many years and we wish we could force her to get the help she needs, its really hard to deal with. If your husband or someone is abusive while the drinking is going on that is not good at all, but do not make excuses for him. you can let him that you are not going to put up with it anymore, maybe offer to go to some AA classes with him, and yes do not buy the stuff for him. I wish you the best of luck.

    Answer by jenn4443 at 6:41 AM on Mar. 12, 2011

  • Get some others together who realize the problem. Do an intervention and get the person some help. If he is endangering himself and/or others, it can sometimes be done without the person agreeing to it.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:44 AM on Mar. 12, 2011

  • Make them go to rehab or leave

    Answer by gemgem at 8:44 AM on Mar. 12, 2011

  • all you can do is support them.. not financially mentally.. if someone doesn't want to come to grips with them having a drinking problem you can't force them to. if they are abusing you (ie maybe your husband) maybe you need to leave or get a restraining order. people that drink do it for a reason. maybe they have depression and use the bottle as a cure for their feelings. they need to get some sort of mental help though. counselling is good to help them talk about what is eating them but at the same time, coming from experience, most won't open up to anyone let alone some stranger charging them for time when they could be using the money to buy more alcohol. if you have kids to this person they also need to be away from this person. (if your partner) you can always get orders put on them so they can't harrass or threaten you not necessarily can't see you at all. goodluck honey. its a tough situation

    Answer by Weldo1983 at 8:48 AM on Mar. 12, 2011

  • Do not physically stay in an abusive relationship for any reason. Do what you can in seeking help for the person, but do not stay with them.

    Answer by meooma at 9:10 AM on Mar. 12, 2011

  • I'm sorry, you can't force them to get help, it won't work, I'm sorry. You can go to ALANON meetings in your area though and find support and information from other people who have acoholics in their lives

    Answer by gypsymama532 at 9:37 AM on Mar. 12, 2011

  • Get as far away from that person as possible unless he/she agrees to go to AA. Also, you need to get involved with Al-Anon for yourself. I'm 55 years old, my father was an abusive alcoholic. The violence and other abuse I dealt with as a child left scars in me to this day. I had one brother. I begged my mother and brother to seek professional help with me. I couldn't wait to turn 18 so I could leave home and when I did, I did leave. Neither one of them would still seek help with me. My father died at a fairly young age, but the scars were already taking a toll on both me and my brother. I lost my one and only brother to AIDS over 10 years ago. This and a lot of other factors contributed to a major breakdown I had about 2 years ago. Don't wait! Get help now!

    Answer by rosiemendo at 9:41 AM on Mar. 12, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.