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Why do I feel jealous?

I am in a relationship with a wonderful man 4yrs next month. He is there for me , we spend time together. He is very active in NA, I have complete respect for that . He has meetings, events he must attend, after all it is his recovery and that is his life! I did at one time try attending, I had done things in the past and well, It didnt work out for me, I dont have those issues. I recalled him telling me it isnt right for men to council me I should get all the womens numbers and seek a bond with them. Yet I discovered this morning he is counciling a woman. She called him after we finished breakfast. He turned down the volume and went in the bedroom to talk. Basically it s been ongoing for awhile and he knows her situation. Shes been in the program for years , he has love for those people.I feel its disrespectful to me , opens things up helping someone with sensitive issues. Why am I upset about this?


Asked by Anonymous at 4:09 PM on Nov. 23, 2008 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • i would be too. your jealous cause he is sharing things about himself with someone else and almost sharing another half of himself with someone else other then you. especially after he told you that he couldn't council you and he is going against the rules and doing so with her. i'm sorry but i would have that be broken off right away. does he have a sponsor you can talk to about this cause this is a no no for a reason and usually cause NA have tendencies they find harder to control therefore are drug addicts or get triggers. he is breaking the rules and i would have his sponsor talk to him about his behavior. it sounds like this is more then just counseling cause for her i bet she will develop feelings for him. this is why it's a no no.

    Answer by melody77 at 4:26 PM on Nov. 23, 2008

  • because you feel left out. However, without having their issue you can't really be a part of what they are dealing with. I agree she should have a female sponsor though. They bond with males and think it's more than what it is. He should know that. He needs to help her find a female to call.

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:21 PM on Nov. 23, 2008

  • He was upset and told me he will council both men and women, give them rides and spend time with them and I should get over it. He loves them and thats the bottom line and does enough for me. I feel hurt and rejected. I think there are plenty of men that can use his support and guidance. There are plenty of women that she can turn to. I am concerned this can easily grow into more. And he's making light of it. I dont think its all about me. I have gone to conventions and been there for him. It feels wrong. Still I feel like he's disrespecting me and not caring about my feelings.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:34 PM on Nov. 23, 2008

  • NA has a policy against men counciling women and women counseling men I believe.

    Answer by NightOwlMama at 5:28 PM on Nov. 23, 2008