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How do you get your kid to do what you want them to do?

I need help!!! Right now my daughter is having a meltdown every second. Any redirecting advice is sooooo apreciated? She is 13 and has meltdowns all the time but tonight is insane. We have been playing the therapist game to find out what mental illness she has which is something but I dont know what. Tonight, she is having major bad day, there was no school, so nothing happened at school, it seemed she had a good day. She is asking me for everything that she knows is unreasonable and so I would say no. She has a tantrum, meltdown, every time I ask her to do a task she has a meltdown. For the last three hours she has been yelling at the dogs, sisters and me. I just need someone to help me find a way to talk to her to get her to understtand and do what I ask of her.

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alisarahkylie

Asked by alisarahkylie at 10:04 PM on Mar. 14, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 3 (19 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • She wants to act like a child??... treat her like one. Explain to her you wont tolerate such behavior.. and if she cant act civil to you and everyone else in the house then for her to go to her room. and if she refuses, threaten to take away something valuable to her... but dont make empty threats actually do it... Explain to her when she's ready to talk without acting like a child then she can get the item back... She wants to make a scene??... make sure she knows that if "she can't take the heat... stay out of the kitchen."
    Shanti0327

    Answer by Shanti0327 at 10:14 PM on Mar. 14, 2011

  • Could she possibly be PMSing?
    coala

    Answer by coala at 10:33 PM on Mar. 14, 2011

  • Thank you I will try that. We have been consistant but its like she is trying to pick a fight. We have tried to send her to her room and she destroyed somethings and cut herself. The last time we sent her to her room she cut her hair and scratched her arm up, and that was over me telling her no we are not going to petsmart because we just came from the mall and mom is tired. I really think there is some psychotic going on with her.
    alisarahkylie

    Comment by alisarahkylie (original poster) at 10:36 PM on Mar. 14, 2011

  • She hasnt started her first period yet. Can she still have pms?
    alisarahkylie

    Comment by alisarahkylie (original poster) at 10:47 PM on Mar. 14, 2011

  • My daughter was out of control the two months prior to starting her period... this is a girl who hadnt given me any issues prior.
    sahlady

    Answer by sahlady at 2:40 PM on Mar. 15, 2011

  • I think you may need to seek some professional help and get her evaluated to see if she's just begging for attention. If she's the middle child that could be part of her attention seeking.
    Shanti0327

    Answer by Shanti0327 at 6:08 PM on Mar. 15, 2011

  • So its the next day and she is perfectly fine, happy and getting along with everyone. We are in the process of getting professional help but the process is soooo long its frustrating because I feel like we are in a crisis because who knows what she could do the next time she has a major meltdown. She is a middle child and definately does things for attention but also there are signs of something mentally wrong. You know when you feel it in your gut, that mothers instinct. Well, I know something is wrong but the professionals look at me like I am a over reacting mother that knows nothing about mental illness.

    I need some magic tricks to handle meltdowns before they get to worse.

    I know that this year has been worse than it ever has been, so maybe it is because she is pmsing. I dont know but it would be nice to know all the answers so I can tell the professionals this is whats going on.
    alisarahkylie

    Comment by alisarahkylie (original poster) at 10:20 PM on Mar. 15, 2011

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