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WHAT DO YOU SAY TO YOUR MOTHER?

Okay so me and The S/O are renting the house from my mother and she is all up in our business. I know that she is worried about me cause I am her daughter and me and the S/O have had issues but now she is putting pressure on me. We moved into the house a year ago and she said that we had to buy the house within that year... well our credit says other wise. When I talked to my mother last Friday she said that We had until October to buy the house then she is putting it on the market... now she is saying that they have someone ready to buy the house and that we need to either buy it ourselves or start looking for a place, she isnt even giving us until October now. On top of that our oven has been broke and she was suppost to come out and fix it Saturday afternoon and she didnt show up... so when I called her at 6 in the evening telling her we had plans we were leaving in an hour she said that she didnt care that she was coming out there that nigt and that we didnt have to be there.... I have a pitbull who is very protective of our house if we arent there he will get aggressive like any dog would! Anyways, she told me that he shouldnt be in the house that he needs to be outside... ( he climbs the fence so I cant put him out there) I have tried! My mother told me that was my problem too bad!! I asked her to come a different night and she started yelling at me threating to take the oven back and stuff, so she came out after all I had to put the dog outside tie him up in the fence so if he was to climb it he would have strangled himself! But it was the chance I was having to take. We got home that night to find that my mom had went all through the house "Inspecting" cause she text me and told me that she was pleased my house was spotless! Its always clean!! THen Sunday she called to ask where the curtains were that were in the back bedroom... I took them down cause it made my house really dark but I still had them... so she got mad cause I took them down!

What would you do if you were in my situation? Todays update is she wants to know the progress on getting a loan to buy the house even though I told her I cant. We want to move i just dont know how to tell my mom!

Answer Question
 
peacockmom704

Asked by peacockmom704 at 1:19 PM on Mar. 15, 2011 in Home & Garden

Level 2 (6 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • Find a new place to rent and put in your notice. I would not put up with that kind of treatment from any landlord, family or not. Good luck to her in finding tenants who will put up with that crap.
    scout_mom

    Answer by scout_mom at 1:25 PM on Mar. 15, 2011

  • I would start looking for a new place and not tell your mother. Did you sign a lease? If not then you are month to month tennant and she only needs 30 days notice. Seriously, she sounds like a monser.
    bcauseimthemom

    Answer by bcauseimthemom at 1:32 PM on Mar. 15, 2011

  • I would abide by my mother's wishes. It is her house and if she doesn't want a dog in it that is her right. I can't believe you would expect your mother to fix your oven! What's wrong with S/O? As for the curtains, she shouldn't care if you took them down. You have your own style. Do you pay rent? Why would you make plans if you knew she was coming to fix the oven. You shouldn't mind if she is there alone, she is your mother. Also, she has the right to inspect although she is required to give a notice. But since it was "spotless" you shouldn't care that she did it. If she has an opportunity to get the house sold I can see were she is coming from. You need to get things in writing if you want to do it like you aren't related. As far as wanting to move, just tell her, it's just business it looks like from my end. If you rented from a stranger you would give a notice wouldn't you? You said you lived there a year and that she gave
    Dianakk

    Answer by Dianakk at 1:34 PM on Mar. 15, 2011

  • you a year, I think the above people are mean. would you really treat you mom that way. I am sure a stranger wouldn't be allowed a pit bull in her house or to have a time for her to work on the oven and make plans to leave and not want her there without them. she is no monster and I am sorry that was said about you mommy. She loves you or wouldn't have given you a year to get a loan. God Bless you and her and I hope you work this out and don't let a house come between you and your mom. my mom is 82 and i cherish every moment i can be with her. good luck kiddo and make s/o fix the oven. lol
    Dianakk

    Answer by Dianakk at 1:38 PM on Mar. 15, 2011

  • You will have more peace in your life when you get out from under your mom's thumb. I know moving is a huge pain, but you all will sleep better when this unbalanced association with your mom is over.

    When you tell her, let her know that you are doing AS SHE ASKED. You can not buy the house within her NEW time-frame, and don't want to get in the way of her buyer, so you will be out as soon as you can find a new place. Let her know, too, that you think it will be better for your relationship with her. You love her, but you need more privacy than she is comfortable with while she is your landlady. GL :-)
    ss_mom

    Answer by ss_mom at 1:41 PM on Mar. 15, 2011

  • We found a place and got approved to rent... as far as my mom fixing the oven she didnt want S/O touching it she wanted my step dad to do it... Me and S/O talked and when we tell her that we are moving at the beginning of the month, we will pay half of Aprils rent so she isnt struggling with the payment that much... i love my mom but she gets under my skin sometimes!
    peacockmom704

    Comment by peacockmom704 (original poster) at 1:43 PM on Mar. 15, 2011

  • In addition to letting her know that you can't buy the house in her timeframe as the reason you are moving, throw in there that she is NOT acting like it is yours and your SO's house at all- that she is acting like it's HER house! She is obviously way too attached to the house if she is having a conniption about you taking down a set of curtains.
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 2:38 PM on Mar. 15, 2011

  • She has told me that it is her house several times that we just rent... I just want out from under her feet.
    peacockmom704

    Comment by peacockmom704 (original poster) at 2:57 PM on Mar. 15, 2011

  • I think you need to do what is best for you and your family, and it sounds to me like living in a place owned by your mom is not it. I would give notice and rent somewhere else...fast!
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 12:18 PM on Mar. 16, 2011

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