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Daughter's boyfriend nowhere to stay.

My daughter's boyfriend's father died recently and his mother has had a few problems coping since his death, she has now basically thrown him out. He is a very nice boy from what I can see and my daughter has begged me to let him stay, I'm pretty sure I should, I wouldn't want a boy out on the streets on his own! And I don't think he has anywhere else to go. What would you do in this situation and what ground rules would you lie down? THANK YOU!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:06 PM on Nov. 24, 2008 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (14)
  • I think thats a very nice thing of you to do. I would let him stay to. Id just make sure they werent sleeping in the same room and werent hanging out alone in her room when no one is home. I dont know how old your daughter or this guy is but just make sure they are clear on the rules. Im sure you will find he is gratefull and is going to be willing to be on his best behavior.
    Mommy2B04

    Answer by Mommy2B04 at 12:08 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • I would first find out if there are any other family members. You may have to call CPS to help. I also agree with the other poster.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:10 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • My daughter is 16 and he's also 16.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:10 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • campout in living room or if extra bedroom...get and hide baby monators if you don't want them to have sex "in your house" hint the "quats" -sp
    mama2twins07

    Answer by mama2twins07 at 12:11 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • Go talk to the mother - get her side and see if you can help her through this horrible time.

    Have a family meeting and bring S-E-X out onto the table - as in, there will be N-O-N-E. (still, baby monitors are a great idea) Take it slowly and a day at a time.
    Wimsey

    Answer by Wimsey at 12:20 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • I would take him in and talk to his mother. I would also have a sex talk with both of them.
    raybell

    Answer by raybell at 12:46 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • I'd like to point out another potential problem, besides sex. I had a friend who did this for her daughter and her boyfriend. They broke up about 2 months after he moved in. Mom was put in the really bad spot of not wanting to throw the boy out on the street, but her daughter hated him and insisted Mom was taking his side against her own daughter. It became a really big issue in their home. And they had been going out for about a yr and a half before he moved in. So, you might want to give that some thought too. Are you going to throw this boy out if they break up? How will your daughter feel if you don't? And don't let her tell you she'd be fine with it if they break up, b/c we all know how teenage girls are when they break up with a boy. Good luck, whatever your decision!
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 12:54 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • i would also talk to his mom. i mean when i was about 17 i said i was thown out so i can live with my boyfriend. he knew the plain but my parents didn't know. They never once went to my parents so i moved in... we broke up and i went home.
    mama2twins07

    Answer by mama2twins07 at 1:07 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • I would also let him stay, BUT WITH SOME GROUND RULES...The baby monitors BRILLIANT, and I would even install a camera someone...like the Nanny Cam, just in case!! lol...Dont worry about it coming off as if you dont trust her, but its just for insurance. Also, the other posters concern if they break up, is there too. I would let him stay, but IMMEDIATELY have a talk with his mother...ALL OF YOU GUYS...if she still doesn't want him back, I would contact someone about seeing if he can be emancipated from his mother. Make him get a job, to help out and save so he will be able to get his own place, JUST IN CASE your daughter and him break up. Let him know, that is only if they break up, or he goes back home. That's very nice of you to take him in, and Good Luck sweetie!!
    YanniSmoMMy

    Answer by YanniSmoMMy at 1:56 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • my boyfriends mother helped me by letting me live there when my mother had it with me and guess what i got pregnant. so make sure that you get on birth control and tell her that you are not saying it's ok cause you got them for her but just for double protection. i would call the mother and see if he has other relatives that could take him in like grandparents or aunts and uncles. no matter how much ground rules you set they are liable to be home at one time or another long enough to mess around if not already besides how long could this go on for? you may not know and you should get the boy a more permanent place to stay that's related to him.
    melody77

    Answer by melody77 at 5:12 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

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