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8 Bumps

What would you do if you knew for sure that another woman was in love with your husband?

There is a woman who my husband slept with twice a few years ago apparently. He told me about it in '09 I believe. I know for a fact that she is in love with him and I wonder if he has spent time with her again, had sex, and more. He works late Friday and usually Saturday nights until like 2:30am and doesn't come home until almost 4am sometimes because he says he takes a co-worker home. This happens almost every weekend. I have always wondered if he is lying but I don't have any proof or anything. I told him when he confessed in '09 that I couldn't and wasn't going to go through him cheating on me again and that I would be gone, along with our two daughters. I just don't know what to do. I know some of you will probably say just leave him but it isn't that simple. I don't know how I would be able to live without him financially and emotionally. We've been together for almost 9 years and married for 2. AGH!!! I just want to scream and cry because I don't know what to do. I have tried to ignore my feelings and thoughts about him possibly cheating but it always is there.

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Bamzakarat

Asked by Bamzakarat at 3:57 AM on Mar. 16, 2011 in Relationships

Level 13 (1,054 Credits)
Answers (27)
  • if it were me I would talk to him and find out what he says. He might not be cheating and you just feel he is because of what happened before so your trust of him is low. If you want to stay with him you are going to have to learn to trust him again and that is a hard thing to do. I think I would consider going to counseling, together and separately.  That way you can talk through the problems you are having.  I understand it not being easy to just leave because if it were me I would try everything to keep my marriage intact.  If in the end I can't then I would cross that bridge when I come to it.


    Good Luck!

    cornflakegirl3

    Answer by cornflakegirl3 at 4:01 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • Who is the person he is giving a ride? You could ask them if your husband takes them home and about what time. I'm sorry, he broke a trust and needs to expect you to be reassured that he is not cheating. That is what I would do but I know I can be vicious.

    pnwmom

    Answer by pnwmom at 4:11 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • The only problem with asking the co worker is I wouldn't be surprised if he would lie for my husband. They are friends for the most part.
    Bamzakarat

    Comment by Bamzakarat (original poster) at 4:12 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • HEY ????

    If you can not Trust him, then get rid of him.

    He knows, where HE BELONGS, HE KNOWS who his wife/Girlfriemd is...

    HE KNOWS, where he should lay ......

    WHY blame her ????

    HIS ASS KNOWS WHERE IT SHOULD BE ????
    SissyAnn141

    Answer by SissyAnn141 at 4:18 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • I'm so tired of the questioning, wondering, and everything else, that I've even tried to convince myself that I really don't care. That he could be having sex with someone else and I wouldn't care, but I know I do. I probably sound ridiculous and immature, I am sorry.
    Bamzakarat

    Comment by Bamzakarat (original poster) at 4:19 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • I know me... and I wouldnt prob. snoop till I found out if he was telling the truth or not...
    mlkmylove

    Answer by mlkmylove at 4:19 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • I ment would***
    mlkmylove

    Answer by mlkmylove at 4:31 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • It sounds like you are kind of settling with him. He's cheated, you dont trust him, and he may be cheating again and your trying to ignore him because you need his money? Do you want to look back on life and see you unhappy with this person or happy with another who loves and respects you enough to keep it in his pants?
    SabrenaLeigh

    Answer by SabrenaLeigh at 5:34 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • So you can not follow him? When he gets off be waiting at his job to see where he goes those two nights.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 5:54 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • If it were me, I'd have to find out! I don't know how old your kids are but if they could spend the night with a family member or friend while you go check on him, thats what I would do. Your gonna always wonder,and thats because he made it so you'd doubt him.It's not fair that you have to wonder!
    anichols1

    Answer by anichols1 at 6:13 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

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