Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Teenagers questions about your past

My 14 yr old daughter asked me today if I ever had sex w anyone besides dad!

If your teenager asks you questions like that or maybe did you ever get drunk, or do drugs etc, would you answer honestly?

I almost did but then decided it really isnt any of her business and told her that nicely.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:54 AM on Mar. 16, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (22)
  • i might answer "we'll talk about that when you're older" if she asked at 14. i would have no problem telling my daughters a little bit of my past, reckless as it was, so i can illustrate the consequences of making bad decisions. however i would want them to be old enough & mature enough to absorb the message!

    Answer by tnm786 at 10:57 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • Of course I would answer honestly, in age-appropriate terms.

    Answer by CraftingMama at 10:57 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • We don't lie. You can't be dishonest with your kids and expect them to tell you the truth. Kids are people too just like you. If they are asking questions they have a need for answers. Talk to your kids. How painful it must be for a teenager to realize their parents are liars.

    Answer by jewjewbee at 10:57 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • My past is my past. Just that. It's over. It has nothing to do with you or now. Do you love me the way I am? I have never cheated on your dad. I don't do drugs, I (don't drink, or drink moderately). Let's leave it at that.

    Answer by Kimimale at 10:59 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • I'd probably tell her but also explain how I regret it

    Answer by June_Mama09 at 10:59 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • Yep I always answered honestly. I would try and use it as a lesson or way to get them to open up. Like with sex, yes I had sex with my 1st serious bf, we were together for many years & used protection. Are you thinking about this? And theyd usually know I was open to a conversation.

    Answer by gemgem at 10:59 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • My 9 year old asked me if i ever "Mated" with my husband (her step dad)...LOL!

    I told her that is none of her business & that you should never ask anyone that question because it's super personal & embarrassing for people to answer.

    I will tell her that i experimented with drugs when the time is right, and we'll talk more about sex when she gets older, She knows about sex, but i am not going to tell her who i had sex with when she is only 9. We'll save that for when she is more mature.

    I think it's definitely OK to keep some secrets from your kids though....

    Answer by samurai_chica at 11:03 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • I would be honest. I didn't do drugs so I have nothing to worry about there. But the other stuff I would talk to her about and tell her how I regret it and tell her how she should wait cause there are diseases out there.

    Answer by mommy5409 at 11:05 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • I'm going to be honest. When I was a teenager, the worst I ever did was have sex with my boyfriend that I dated almost the whole time I was in high school, and sometimes I skipped school. That was it. I never drank until I was almost legal (but out of school), I never did drugs or even smoked cigarettes, and I didn't get pregnant with my son until I was almost 19. I wasn't necessarily a goodie-goodie... I just didn't see the point in doing those things.
    I just hope my son will believe me! :P

    Answer by AdensMama0308 at 11:06 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • I dont lie, but my past is my personal business... just like if a friend asked me. I have a 16 yr old who has asked me those types of questions. I told her truths with out details. (example... I have been a non-virgin longer than I have been a virgin... she can do the math and figure it out)   Asking about past men is personal... and I would tell her so... but I would add that as she grows and makes choices for herself she must remember that she could also get these questions from a husband or child... and how would either of them feel if there were multiple men in HER past... so she must make life choices accordingly

    REally to give them too much info (depending on your history) is to lower the bar..Well mom slutted around so I can too... she may tell me this or that but she did it and is fine now so I can too.


    Answer by Anonymous at 11:09 AM on Mar. 16, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.