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2 Bumps

For c-section moms---Did you feel like you missed out because you didn't get to have a vaginal birth?

I wanted so badly to have a vaginal birth. I wanted to labor and work and push to have my baby and I never got to experience that. I think women are so beautiful and strong when they are working so hard for their babies.

I feel like I missed out on a rite of passage into motherhood and I'll never know what it's like......

Please don't bash me, ladies. I am only saying how I feel.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:43 PM on Mar. 16, 2011 in Parenting Debate

This question is closed.
Answers (31)
  • You shouldn't feel bad. You DID work hard for your baby. If having major surgery isn't hard work, I don't know what is. I had a vaginal birth and yes, I worked hard but so did you. Is baby healthy? THAT'S what matters most momma!
    TARARENEE

    Answer by TARARENEE at 9:49 PM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • Nope..not at all.. I missed out on raising my daughter as she was stillborn at 36 weeks. That coupled with other issues resulted in a repeat c-section almost 3 years ago with my 3rd daughter. That c-section enabled me to raise this child as it saved her life as well as mine. I actually enjoyed my second c-section and my recovery was a breeze- up and running around in a matter of a couple of days...
    mcginnisc

    Answer by mcginnisc at 9:49 PM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • Nope. All that mattered to me was my babies coming into the world healthy and safe.
    Izsarejman

    Answer by Izsarejman at 9:50 PM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • Nope, I dont feel like I missed out on it. I got the job done and had my healthy boys. Plus stuff just happens when a csection is needed, no need to stress over it.

    ooohhh i already know a mom whos typing really fast bashing all the moms who had a csection.lol. im going to check back this question to see if she does
    BrittanyD07

    Answer by BrittanyD07 at 9:51 PM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • yes both my boys were c-section my first after 10 and half hours of labor and he didnt move and then my youngest made it to 7cm and he got stuck and yes i feel like i missed out on alot
    myboysRmyhero

    Answer by myboysRmyhero at 9:49 PM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • Yep, I sure feel that way. I always tell people my body cheated me out of the experience! I especially feel that way now when I'm recovering from c-section #3! Ugh!
    Nanixh

    Answer by Nanixh at 9:51 PM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • I've had both and let me tell you both are just as tough! You work hard either way. It really doesn't matter how you give birth because the only part you really remember is hearing the first cries and getting to hold that baby for the first time!
    KJohnson4762

    Answer by KJohnson4762 at 9:53 PM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • Not at all. I labored for 23 hours and my son got stuck and his heartrate bottomed out. If I didn't have the C-section, one or both of us would have died. How is it that a woman who doesn't give birth vaginally, is cheated out? You still work hard and deliver a baby with a C-section. It isn't how the baby comes into the world but that they baby and mother are HEALTHY!
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 9:56 PM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • No I don't feel that way at all, having a c-section is not a walk in the park. I can not have a vaginal delivery, it's simply not possible. The doctor's did not notice my narrow pelvic bone until after I demanded a c-section because my daughter refused to be born - after three days of labor with induction drugs, and it was during the c-section they realize if I hadn't had the c-section its more than likely my daughter wouldn't have survived (she was also in trouble and the monitors did not pick up on it) and I also could have possibly died. My 2nd daughter was a planned c-section (obviously) but it wasn't much easier, I had a panic attack during the delivery and I could barely move for two days - which stressed me out since I was moving around like normal after just a few hours when my first daughter was born.
    momof2inCT2007

    Answer by momof2inCT2007 at 9:58 PM on Mar. 16, 2011

  • I haven't had my baby yet - so I don't know how it will happen. I can understand your feeling though and am sorry you struggle with feeling like you missed out.

    Even though I haven't experienced this yet my small advice, for what it's worth, would be to remember that undergoing major surgery is a different kind of working for your baby - and giving up an experience that was precious to you for the health of your baby was a big sacrifice. Your baby won't remember this difference, but the fact that he or she is alive and safe could be a direct result of that decision.

    I hope that in time you feel less sad about it. And you never know - maybe another baby will come and you'll have the chance again!
    angelmommy11

    Answer by angelmommy11 at 9:48 PM on Mar. 16, 2011