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3 Bumps

What would you do?

if your BF was gonna attend a wedding with his ex "fling"?

but you dont know about it b/c he never told you--- actually he LIED and said it was a day with his dad...

the wedding hasnt come up yet (april 23rd)... but he's for sure going.

i want to end it with him, if he goes. i'm PISSED that he lied to me about it.... and now, he's gonna go. for the record, if he was honest with me, i wouldnt be so mad-- i would be hurt if he went, but not to the point of callign this relationship off.

am i over reacting? what would you do in this situation? also-- remember that you have NO idea what's really going on. all he's told you is 1) the girl has a wedding to go to in April 2) April 23rd is the day he's gonna hang out with his dad.

this ex fling has tried to get him to sleep with her back in 09, when she last came to visit.. she LICKED his face! knowing damn well that he was in a relationship!

Answer Question

Asked by Shy_Dia at 12:42 AM on Mar. 17, 2011 in Relationships

Level 15 (2,142 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • OMG yes I'd be steaming mad! They're both to blame though. No one's twisting his arm and why won't he bring you along, which is the obvious logical choice? I think he secretly still has feelings for her or just can't commit. I went through something like this before and it's like 2 people who had their chance before and don't date but still flirt at the cost of hurting others. Honestly the revengeful side of me would start going out to make him wonder where I was and who I was with for a change. I would end it with him though. That is clearly not a considerate person. No excuse/explanation can ever justify that. Be strong and be with a real man who doesn't sneak around. Don't let him string you along!

    Answer by hellokittykat at 12:48 AM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • i would dump him. i have been in a relationship with a guy who lied, cheated, and lied by omission. i saw a lot of warning signs, i called him out on some , i ignored some but i still continued being in the relationship. he then became sneakier and kept on lying. i should have ended the relationship when i caught him in is lies when we were only months into the relationship. i could have saved myself a whole lot of heart ache. your bf obviously has something to hide that is why he lied. take heed this is a red flag.

    Answer by gwen20 at 12:48 AM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • that's not cool i would be so pissed!!

    Answer by Ericaca at 12:49 AM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • we've been together for 2 years though-- over 2 years! my son (5 now) ADORES him and i'll be honest, i love him... but i cannot take the lies! i really feel/think that he was the one-- before this lie.

    how fucking hard is it to be honest?!

    Comment by Shy_Dia (original poster) at 12:51 AM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • Maybe it's time you asked yourself if you really want your son "adoring" someone who openly lies to his mother. Yes, he's only 5, but there is NEVER just one lie, what else will your son be exposed to as time goes on? More face licking from ex flings? Not cool - he'd be OUT! Please DO think of your son.

    Answer by raynestar at 1:00 AM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • I would be so MAD! I would leave because it is so darn disrespectful to you and your relationship.

    Answer by Hatsumomo at 2:40 AM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • That just sucks. Poor you. I just deplore being lied to. I am sorry sweetie. Yes, i may be pretty angry as well.

    Answer by rosetoes at 3:41 AM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • How do you know this information? Just knowing how some guys think, are you sure he knows that the wedding is April 23rd? I think I would want to talk this out with him before I made any rash decisions. Sometimes there is more to the story than we realize.

    I don't agree with him going to the wedding with an Ex. He is a guy though, so maybe he thinks it isn't a big deal. Men have a hard time understanding women. Talk to him. You didn't write that he has lied to you before. Find out his story before you make any decisions.

    Answer by momofkids at 8:59 AM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • his dad would probably never call and say save a date. he works practically every day, and when he doesnt, he's running errands with/for his wife (bf's mom)... plus when he was telling me about it, i just knew that he was lying-- it doesnt sound right. in the almost 3 years that i've known him, he's never planned a day with his dad.

    this may be the first time he lied to me... i actually don't know. i want to say it is, but i could be wrong. this is the first lie i caught him in, at least.

    i found out through facebook- their messages. when i first found out, i thought it was my account (was on it like 10 minutes before- no clue he signed me out).

    he KNOWS that i dont like her, plus she practically invited him back to her hotel room, if thats where she stays!

    i just HATE being lied to!

    Comment by Shy_Dia (original poster) at 9:24 AM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • He would no longer be my BF.

    Answer by HKing01 at 10:26 AM on Mar. 17, 2011

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