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2 Bumps

My husband the cheater...

He has cheated on me it seems a million times. But he always says he wants to be with me, and that he will change (bullsh*t). But I believe he wants to stay with me, if he did not he could leave anytime. I have no friends or family to stay with, no money to leave since I am taking care our children and a newborn. I am trapped here. I do not love him, but we are civil always, and he can not hurt me anymore, since I could care less I am used to him being the way he is. Really what should I do, what can I do?


Asked by Anonymous at 3:08 PM on Mar. 17, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • If you don't love him, and you don't care what he does, and he's always stepping out on you, that's not really a marriage in the first place. I agree that you should find a way to make some money or put some aside and plan your get away. You deserve a faithful man that loves and respects you. Don't settle, you and your children deserve better.

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 12:36 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • why are you bringing babies in to the world with a man you don't love and who will show your children that he does not respect you or his family by constantly cheating and having this drama in both of your lives??

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 3:14 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • Everyone is so quick to say to leave, but, you can't dispute the fact that when you have newbies and small kids, it is harder to survive as a single parent . . . sometimes impossible. If noone is in danger, sometimes is is better to stay put while you come up with an exit strategy and are able to have the kids a little older and a nestegg to work with. The only time you need to do something quickly is if there is physical or mental abuse involved.

    If you are unhappy, forge you exit strategy . . .

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:16 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • You can live in a loveless marriage where he doesnt respect you, or you can leave. That is really all you can do. Since you dont care and he isnt hurting you anymore I would just start making plans without telling him. Maybe look into a part time job, then an apartment, make some friends at work, and put your money aside, even just half a check. Tell him its for the kids savings. With a newborn you can maybe babysit at home and earn some cash that way. Then when you are ready, leave.

    Answer by gemgem at 3:10 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • Start taking classes so you can get a job to support your self.

    You can do whatever you want it just takes good planing and time.

    Or stay till the kids are out of school, and that is only if he is a great dad and supports you all well.

    Answer by gammie at 3:16 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • Just let him know its over. You dont deserve that

    Answer by kylansmommy09 at 3:10 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • well if it doesn't bother you and you have no where to go because you have no money, job or friends and family then deal with his infidelities and don't have sex with him again. yeah he comes home to you but he is screwing around. you have to find some way to do something. to find a job or some resources in your state or city to get out of there. no woman should be disrespected like that and especially after having his children.

    Answer by lucky35 at 3:11 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • honestly i would stick it out just to safe up as much money as you can and while your doing that y not have some fun for yourself it will help get threw those rough time

    Answer by cnoble927 at 3:19 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • Do you have daughters, sons? Would you want your daughters to think that the type of relationship that you are in is what they should settle for? Or do you want them to see what a truly loving relationship is like?
    Do you want your sons to act this way and think that it's ok because mom put up with it?

    You can do this on your's hard as most of us single moms have found but if you are determined, it can be done. You may have to make some sacrifices to do it but it's worth being a role model to our children.

    I would much rather have my kids see that I stand for something and deserve better. That way they don't fall into the belief that they should settle.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 3:20 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • Don't ever feel like you are trapped.. there is always a way out. Maybe he needs a wake up call.. let him understand exactly what he is doing to the relationship. And, to be honest girl, once a cheater.. always a cheater.. If he does not have any respect for you.. then lose him girl! We deserve better than that. I went through about the exact same thing. You need to realize that people can be complete a**holes..but it's your choice wether or not to let it bother you. Keep your head up!

    Answer by kristinamalek at 3:20 PM on Mar. 17, 2011