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I lost my dog yesterday...forever...I can't stop blaming myself...

6-1/2 years ago, a mangy old husky mix breed dog came up to my future husband at our office. Everyone was kicking him away and being mean, but my husband took him and nursed him back to health. He named him Mange. The vet gave him a few months to live tops. Like I said, that was over 6 years ago. Over the past 6 years, he's had a few outbreaks of mange, but we have medicine to keep it under control. We just moved to a new neighborhood and we haven't gotten the dogs new tags yet. So when he broke out on Monday morning, we were scared to death and immediately went in search of him and putting up flyers. We had so many calls from people that had seen him and some that had even picked him up, but didn't know where to take him because he didn't have any ID. We expanded our search to further down the highway into even more neighborhoods thinking maybe he just wandered further.

Yesterday, we planned to get off early and go searching some more because most of the calls were saying he was only one neighborhood over from ours. At 12:30pm, we got a call from a woman saying she thought she saw our dog...and he had been hit by a car. 5 minutes later, another call from a man saying the same thing. I raced home to the spot where they said he was, the whole time thinking no...not our baby. He survived for so many years with a terrible disease and THIS is how he dies? NO! But when I got there, it was confirmed that it was him. I feel like a failure, a monster, a terrible person, irresponsible for not having his tags made IMMEDIATELY! Everyone keeps saying that I need to stop blaming myself and just learn from this tragedy. But I am the mother of our household! I should have made sure he was safe...I feel like I let a member of my family die because of my "too busy" schedule.

It's really just therapeutic to type all that out...thanks for listening.

Answer Question

Asked by Jeannie721 at 4:21 PM on Mar. 17, 2011 in Pets

Level 11 (553 Credits)
Answers (26)
  • I hope you find him soon. We love our animals.

    Answer by meooma at 4:24 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • It is not your fault. Breathe.

    Answer by khf22 at 4:24 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • Know what? Maybe it was simply Mange's time...getting hit is awful but hopefully a quick way to go. It could have happened to anyone. I'm sorry for your loss...listen for his footsteps around the house. You will hear his spirit...really!

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:24 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • He is dead meo

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:24 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • *hugs* Love. I lost our cat - shelfishly letting him explore the porch without tags and he either jumped or someone took him from our second floor - that was 9 years ago and I still am not over it and that is nothing compared to what you must feel right now.. I am so sorry for your loss.. know that you and your husband treated this animal with love and gave him a better life than anyone ever could have.. I know it hurts.. *hugs*

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 4:25 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • I'm so sorry... I know I would have done the same thing if I was in your shoes. But sometimes, bad things just happen. He could have gotten out and hit by a car right away, and him not having his tags would have made no difference. Our county requires all dogs to be microchipped, so mine are, but they don't wear collars, so if they'd get out, people wouldn't know where to go either.

    And think of it this way, you gave your dog 6 extra years he most likely wouldn't have had if your husband hadn't picked him up.... And that's worth a lot!

    Answer by Anouck at 4:26 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • The thing about husky's is they are runners... once they get out they run and roam by nature. Don't beat yourself up for an animal doing something that is instinctual. (((((hugs)))) I know how you feel... we lost one or our cats the day after thanksgiving. We didn't even know he was sick until it was to late to save him. You do the best you can on any given day.... fate takes care of the rest. ((((hugs))))


    Answer by Crafty26 at 4:28 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • I'm sooo sorry, I know your pain, something similar happened to me too and it's terrible! It's hard not to blame yourself but the truth is, if you'd had known something like this was gonna happen before hand, you would have had the tags made because you loved your dogie, you can't blame yourself, it truly was an accident.Try to look at the positive, you showed that dog more love than he probably would have ever got to experience otherwise, as tragic as it was, it was just his time to go. Again, I'm sorry for your families loss, it's gonna take time to get over this!


    Answer by anichols1 at 4:35 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • Thanks for sharing your pain, and allowing me to help you carry it. I understand what you mean about feeling responsible, he was part of your family circle. Take comfort in the fact that you did do everything you could to find him, and he knew that he was loved. No one else wanted the job, but you didn't throw him out. it's hard to say, but it just was his turn to go. Mange was happy and loved and he gave back the love he recieved to all of you. Decide how to honor your family member, and do it. Then imagine if he were you. would you want your family to go on and give that love to another pet? Not immediately of course, but when the time comes, keep sharing and let another animal share with all of you once more. I hope all of you do well.

    Answer by GiGito1SoFar at 4:36 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

  • Awww, Mama- I'm so sorry for your loss! Mistakes happen- you can't blame yourself! You gave him a wonderful loving home, all the food and love he needed. Just focus on how you got to keep him healthy and happy for that time that you had him.

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 4:36 PM on Mar. 17, 2011

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