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Should I worry about my 5th grader who bullies her little brother and never share her secret world with no one including me?

bouncing momThis school year my 10 year old started 5th grade at a new school: intermediate. Over the last few months I’ve notice her being very mean to her little brother and only playing with him when her friends are not around. She also bosses him and make him do things she suppose to do and sometimes take away things that is his in secret. She’s always been the type of child who's not open and keep to herself, but she’s never mistreated her brother. She accuses him of wrong doing she does, and have gotten him in trouble many times lately. We are a tight nit family, and have open discussions to talk about things to help them understand their wrong/bad choices, as well as positive things such as what they want to be in life or what they like to do when they grow up. My 8 year old always have been open and love being the center of attention. But my 10 year old many times I have to force by encouragement with love what she like and don’t like. Even then she is quiet and barely share her thoughts, views, and ideas on things. I’m always told the one who acts up is not the one a parent should worry about: it’s the one who is always quiet and never shares their secret world. She is in counseling: in fact, she have 2 counselors and a mentor. I did share with one of her counselors, who feels she have to open up on her own: so she doesn't push her to open and talk, she leaves it along and up to my 10 year old. Could this be a sign that she is severely bullied, hiding a huge painful secret, or just don’t care about life and wants to be left along?  Thanks for your comments....

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ladynell4god

Asked by ladynell4god at 10:56 PM on Mar. 17, 2011 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 10 (477 Credits)
Answers (1)
  • Sound to me like typical tween behavior...Especially the not wanting to talk thing...Blaming her bad behavior on him is pretty common among siblings--they try to keep themselves out of trouble by blaming the other kids in the house.
    laird6372

    Answer by laird6372 at 10:07 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

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