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Leave me alone mom! PLEASE HELP!!!

My son is turning two in august and hes developing some very bad habits i dont spank or hit or yell but when i try to control the situation he yells screams kicks and now fights me i have scratches on my chest... he yells to me NO leave me alone or shut up and now he calls me by my first name hes sooooo sweet 98% of the time but when hes up set and i dont give him what he wants he can be a little bully... my parents and n laws give him what ever he wants and when i say no to something he acts out and they tell him yes im so over whelmed and dont want to hurt anyones feelings but its harder on me WHAT TO DO ? WHAT TO DO?

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Asked by missyluvsbrook at 11:52 PM on Mar. 17, 2011 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 3 (22 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • I used not to yell or spank my daughter but that's when she got out of control. and once they get to that point, it's hard to stop. I spank her now and yell at her, and it stops her for the time being but she'll continue doing it later. the quicker you intervene, the better. i tried time out and taking away toys but that didn't work. you have to find a punishment that is effective for your child and stick to it. she tells me that she doesn't love me and tells me to go away as well. I don't punish her for that but I tell her that it really hurts my feelings.and if she asks me for something soon after i tell her "no, you don't love me" and she'll say that she does love me and apologizes. i remind her that it hurts my feelings but i forgive her.

    Answer by TiffanieK at 12:05 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • sounds like you're doing everything right and the inlaws need to be put in their place. My daughter is the same way. she's 2 1/2 and I had that talk with my own parents. They need to butt out during the disciplining stage. My daughter has gotten to the point where she has gotten a spank b/c she's just so defiant. that was just leading to her hitting me even more. Now if she does it, I calmly put her down get up and walk away. That has made the biggest impact so far. However, unless your inlaws are on the same page as you and respect the way you are raising your child it's gonna be an uphill battle for you.

    Answer by calliesmommie at 12:13 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • I personally don't know if I would do the "no, you don't love me" game...that's emotionally confusing to a toddler and I don't think they reason the same way that we do. But that's just me.

    Answer by calliesmommie at 12:15 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • I'm right with you in the in-law department. I say no, they say yes, then the kids learn it's ok to disrespect mom. I still haven't figured out what to do about them. As far as the "I don't love you" issue, it sounds like what you're doing is working so far. My sister was having trouble with her 4 year old saying that to her. On the last occasion that he told her he didn't love her, I scolded him and told him that it was a terrible thing to say to his mommy and it really made her feel sad..he hasn't done it since. I think sometimes our kids just need to hear someone elses voice tell them the things that we keep telling them over and over. It seems to make more of an impression.

    Answer by PurpleOpal at 12:39 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

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