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How do you tell em it's Over??

Ok, my kid's dad is in jail, will be out in Jan. We have had lots of issues and have we both have grown apart. Been together a lot of years but not married we have two children. How do you tell em it's over and you've met some one else? Question two a letter or in person which is better?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:17 PM on Nov. 24, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • If it were me I would probably tell him in a letter since he is in jail and will then have time to deal with it on his own. You never really know how a man or woman will react when you tell them you are done putting up with their crap. Good Luck.
    imtheonlysane1

    Answer by imtheonlysane1 at 9:21 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • Since u have kids together I would tell him in person but if he is violent in anyway i would tell him in a letter... but make sure u explane to him that he can still see the kids and all that.... cause he might get all mad if he thinks u are tring to take them from him
    Pooky_mommy

    Answer by Pooky_mommy at 9:21 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • You owe it to your partner to do it in person. Especially if you have children together. (Unless he is abusive) Then do it in a letter. Be nice and to the point. It is never easy!
    coke2pep

    Answer by coke2pep at 9:48 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • Excellent question. Either way sort of sucks. They expect their women to be waiting for them so the shock might cause a negative reaction. If he reacts inside he could get in trouble and get more time but have time to cool off and accept it before he gets out. Once out, he might just react and like others said, if he is violent it won't be pretty. You know him better than anyone else. Maybe you should talk to your new guy and ask him what he thinks. Is there any way others may have already broken the news to him? (family? friends?) Good luck on this one.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:09 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • I'd go to him in jail if possible. But then, it's not like he cared enough for your relationship not to land his butt in jail in the first place so maybe a letter. What is he ever going to have to offer you or the kids with a prison record? Whether you go to him or mail a letter just give it to him straight. You want something better then he can provide and you think you've found it. I would specify that you wish to keep this parting friendly for the sake of the kids and when he's released you can discuss visitation etc. But remember, even with that you, yourself, do not have to ever see him again. Other people can be the go betweens.
    L.A.F.outloud

    Answer by L.A.F.outloud at 10:23 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • when he gets out of jail,because he will have time to think about you with another man,and its not god when a man has a lot of time to think.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:45 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • U all gave such great answers to this question, I guess it's better to just leave the part about the other man out of it at first he knows we have been on the rocks way before he want in jail, so I'm sure he has some ideas based on things I've said and not said in recent letters. So it's all up in the air right now..but thanks lady's for all yr answers and advice...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:29 PM on Nov. 25, 2008

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