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Not too sure if I want to have his child...

Hey ladies,

Dh & I are going thru invitro. We are schedule to transfer if all goes well in Jan. but know I am not too sure if want to have his child. I am nervous because his family has a history of drinking. I am over reacting ?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 9:20 PM on Nov. 24, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • Should you not have thought of this before?

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:22 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • If you don't want to have his child, I would highly suggest waiting to get pregnant until you get that figured out. It's only fair to your future child to have a good relationship with their father.

    Answer by weezer_cookie at 9:22 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • You know before I got prego with my DD I always said I would not have my SOs baby. We both have very different ways of parenting and it was a fight I just did not want. Then I had my beautiful DD. I do not care if I would have had her with the milk man I love her with all my heart!

    Answer by imtheonlysane1 at 9:23 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • ... Do you really love him? Do you wanna be with him for the rest of ur life? U need to do whats right for u? My hubbies family has alot of drinkers in it to... But i wouldnt give up my hubby for anythng...

    Answer by Pooky_mommy at 9:24 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • Is the sole reason you don't want his child because his family has a history of drinking? I don't understand that. Just because he may be more genetically inclined to drink doesn't mean he's going to turn into a drunk.

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 9:24 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • Isn't invitro terribly expensive? I don't think you guys should be paying for this unless you're 10000000000% sure that it's what BOTH of you want.

    Answer by caitxrawks at 9:26 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • that's a choice you-and only you-can make! i believe if alcoholism does run in the family, it's still all in how you raise your kids and one factor is-will you or dad be drinking around them on a daily basis? yes, they could grow up to be alcoholics but no one can predict the future! your child could grow up to be the president or a's just a chance we all take. raise your child the way you see fit and they will turn out the way they were meant to.

    Answer by pinkclover at 9:27 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • before i got pregnant wiht my oldest i didnt even like kids. hated them i really did. now that i have her i love kids...ok only if they are clean, not sticky or screaming ahha. do you want children? if that answer is yes and you are unsure of having ur hubbys then what does that say about ur marriage? all families have dirty little secrets. we have alcoholics in my fam and i am not one, nore are any of my sibs. we also have eating disorders in my fam. dont have that either. i would realllly talk it over with him soon. you dont want to bring it up the day beore the procedure.

    Answer by CAarmywife at 9:30 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • Thanks Ladies for all opinions. Even the lady with the first smart ass comment.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:32 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • I think if there is any question in your mind about having a having a baby, I'd wait and sort things out. What about getting some counseling to look into your feelings?

    Best of luck to you.

    Answer by pugpin at 9:34 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

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