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Does anyone else have a friend or friends...

only when they need something or find time in their busy schedule? Me and this so called friend has been friends since junior high. like 15 or 16 years now. But lately she only calls and texts when its convenient for her. For days I wont her from her and then poof there she is. Not to mention we live like 3 houses down. Just kinda hurts my feelings I guess. When I need to talk or need help with something lately she is never available. But once she needs something she starts calling and texting over and over. Its really starting to get on my nerves.

 

 

**note** didnt know where to post this sorry

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:35 AM on Mar. 18, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (6)
  • A fair weather friend. Yes, I had one. The friendship finally died because it was all about her and she was not a good listener. it went on for years though because I am a good listener. Then I realized I needed more from a friend. I wish you all the best.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 9:05 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • I can relate to your frustration but also may be guilty of doing this to my friends (unintentionally). At times the demands of having kids does not allow me to spend time with my friends or even chat with them as much as I would like to do. I know one my close friends share very similar feelings as you towards me. We used to spend a lot of time together with our families and as of lately barely speak to each other. I feel bad but honestly I have been so busy focusing on my kids success in school, my marriage and work that I barely have energy for anything else. When I do have time and what not, I call her or text.

    I guess what I am trying to say is that your friend may not mean to do this to you and may be totally unaware of how it affects you. Maybe when you do get a chance to visit with her you can find a way to express your feelings. Without knowing much more about the situation, this is all I can suggest. i hope it helps
    mrs_dybdahl

    Answer by mrs_dybdahl at 12:51 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • Hmm... but most of the people are like that. Give only that much attention as is required...
    AnuMeha

    Answer by AnuMeha at 2:23 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • I don't call and text them because I need something, but I am guilty of losing contacts for a few days or weeks and then texting or calling. It's not something I do on purpose. I just get so busy with the kids, the SO, and everything else I do that I end up not having time for chatting. Then, things settle down a bit and I have a little breathing room and call my friends up again. The advantage I have here is that most of my friends are the same way, so none of us really feel offended by it.

    If it really bugs you just tell her. "Hey, I really feel hurt that you only call/text me when you need something, but you're never available when I need something from you. Why is this?" It may not change. She may not even be able to explain it; she might not even know she does it. If that's the case, then you just decide if you want to deal with this as is or let the friendship go.
    wendythewriter

    Answer by wendythewriter at 10:38 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • HHHHMMM.............................................

    Not here for me ---I am not here for you....
    SissyAnn141

    Answer by SissyAnn141 at 3:08 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • Thanks ladies yall have shared alot of good advice with me. Maybe I just need to let it roll off my shoulder I guess. Neither one of us work so we're both at home. Just kinda hit me that we dont do anything together anymore or hardly talk or text. We'll I try all the time but she never answers like i said above. Oh well just going try and stay focused on my family thats whats an important. Yall have a great day
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 11:24 AM on Mar. 18, 2011