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Please help me figure out what to do. My brother is mentally-handicapped and I'm afraid he's getting depressed.

This is defiantely not "just for fun" but I don't know where else to put it. I will probably post in relationships, as well, to get plenty of input. My brother is 18. Let me explain some of our back-ground to help you better understand the situation. This may be long, but please bear with me b/c my mom & I are concerned & don't know what to do. When my brother was only 13 months old, my dad beat my brother so bad it caused brain damage. He was in the hospital for 3 months and no one thought he would make it. He had numerous surgeries, & was kept alive by machines. My dad was addicted to cocaine & beat me, my mom & my brother severely & often. When I was 8 & my brother was 5 he commited suicide. A few years later my mom remarried to a man that did treat my brother & I better, but he was an alcoholic. My mom became an alcoholic as well. My brother & I were very close growing up. I was always the one to look out for him. cont.

 
renea20

Asked by renea20 at 10:48 PM on Nov. 24, 2008 in Health

Level 32 (57,144 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • I can tell you from my own depression and dealing with it with various friends and relatives that it is serious. You and your mom need to contact his treating physician and let him/her know what is going on. If there are alarming things going on, try to convince him to go to the nearest ER. That is the fastest way to get him help. If you feel it can wait until morning, then one of you get on the phone with the doctors' office right away in the morning and ask to talk to the doctor's nurse. Explain in detail what your concerns are and why. Family history is imperative for the doctor to know.


    *cont'd*

    Babylove76

    Answer by Babylove76 at 1:26 AM on Nov. 25, 2008

  • There's nothing like a "special" sibling to make you realize how cruel & heart-less some people are! Anyways - He had a very rough life. My step-dads best friend became a sort of "father-figure" to us. He passed away 4 years ago. Kids at school taunt & tease him. When I moved out, it seems he got more depressed. He's always asking me to move back home, & telling me he misses me. He will call me when he hears one of my favorite songs on the radio to tell me he's thinking about me. I talk to him almost every day, & see him at least once a week, but I don't think that's enough. I don't think he understands WHY I moved out. cont.
    renea20

    Answer by renea20 at 11:01 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • Your brother's Dr. needs to know if your brother seems depressed. Let the Dr. know how your brother is reacting, that will help them make a decision on what to do next. There are medications that can help. My son has Autism and very bad moodswings. Medication has helped him greatly.
    LisaAC

    Answer by LisaAC at 11:02 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • I'm afraid he thinks I was leaving him. My mom is now alcohol-free. She almost died from pancreatitis in July & has been sober since. But my brother was at my grandpa's while she was in the hospital & we didn't tell him until she got out. I think that may have been a mistake. He was in a very bad car wreck with my grandpa. He was ok, but it almost killed my grandpa. I think that has traumatized him. Now I've told you the back-ground, I'll tell you why we think he's depressed. HE doesn't eat as much as he use to. He goes to bed around 6 every night, which is very unusual. He's become snappy towards my mom & step-dad. This has all come on in the past month or so.
    renea20

    Answer by renea20 at 11:13 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • My mom & I have tried talking to him, but he's not very good at expressing emotion other than anger. My mom would gladly send him to a therapist, but we doubt he would talk to them. Depression runs very strong in my family. (obvious from my dad.) We're really getting worried he may kill himself, too. Any advice you can give would be very appreciated & could save his life. Have any of you dealt with this? what should we do? I'm desperate for answers!
    renea20

    Answer by renea20 at 11:13 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • Oops, I just realized I accidentally out this in "health" and not "just for fun." Oh, well. I guess this is a better category for this!
    renea20

    Answer by renea20 at 11:53 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • *cont'd*

    The doctor will then likely want to see your brother. Do whatever and I mean WHATEVER it takes to get him to go to the doctor. He obviously needs help. Do not mess around with it. Get him to the doctor or the ER. Let your brother know that you are here for him now. It may help if you let him know that you are sorry he has felt so lonely without you around. He obviously doesn't understand that you didn't "leave him". He seems to have abandonment issues, so when you are able to get him to realize you are back to stay, make sure to remember that he will likely (for lack of a better word) freak out when you leave. Get him help! His life is literally in your hands...he can't help himself. GL, hun and PM me if you ever want to talk...
    Babylove76

    Answer by Babylove76 at 1:26 AM on Nov. 25, 2008