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How do I do this

My ex still cares about me and is having a hard time seeing me move on. I'll always love him and we're still friends. He moved on and has dated other women so I know how he feels, and feel bad for him. How do I make it less hurtful for him?

 
KlieneMutter

Asked by KlieneMutter at 11:18 PM on Nov. 24, 2008 in Relationships

Level 5 (98 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • That's really thoughtful of you to be concious of his feelings but everyone is right.....it's not your duty to try to make him feel better. Even if you are felling guilt because the breakup was your fault (I have no idea) it's still something that he has to learn to get over on his own. If you continue to be there for him and/or try to make him feel better, however that may be, you are probably going to make it worse. He'll be confused, thinking you still want him and he'll never move on. He'll keep hanging on to that hope that you might come back. Anyway, only my opinion. Best Wishes.
    Raegy

    Answer by Raegy at 2:58 AM on Nov. 25, 2008

  • He's dating other women, yet he's having a hard time accepting that you're dating other men? Tough shit, excuse my language. It's not your job to make him feel better about this. You are broken up, and therefore he needs to learn to cope with this on his own, without your help. It's okay to be sensitive and not do anything to flaunt your romantic life in front of him, but he needs to face reality, and the sooner the better.
    BlueFrogMama

    Answer by BlueFrogMama at 11:22 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • You need to not lead him on at all (not saying you are - just sayin) Showing that you care is only going to make it worse for him. Its over, its done, thats that.

    Sorry, I can never be friends with my ex's because they don't move on, and being around them just makes it worse. I suppose it would be different if we had a kid or something, but really I don't talk to an ex unless I have to.
    CarolynBarnett

    Answer by CarolynBarnett at 11:22 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • Don't enable him. Let him deal with his own issues. Remember the story of the baby chick in the egg. If you help it through the hard part of struggling to get through the egg you not only do him a disservice but it could actually be detrimental to him. Don't cause him harm. Leave the man alone and he'll be fine. Let him grow from the experience.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:40 PM on Nov. 24, 2008

  • Move FAR FAR away from him and dont talk to him for a while. That usually lets him get settled with a new girl and then he will get over you.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 12:30 AM on Nov. 25, 2008

  • its not your job to make it less hurtful. Its all part of the healing process. You cant make it better that is up to him. But you can make it worse. Being exposed to your love life etc may be hurtful to him but the only thing you can really do is cut down on contact. So yuo make the choice.
    humaniterian87

    Answer by humaniterian87 at 1:44 AM on Nov. 25, 2008

  • Something I heard on the radio not long ago: people who break up and remain just friends....there is at LEAST one of the two who have ulterior motives to remaining friends. This guy is trying to keep you hanging on to him. Do yourself a HUGE favor and quit letting him try to control you. He's a big boy. I am sure that he has his big boy undies on....let him fulfill them or go back to his mama!

    Babylove76

    Answer by Babylove76 at 1:53 AM on Nov. 25, 2008

  • who cares how he feels. he is your ex. im shocked that you even care. its fine to be friends, but maybe you should think if its right for you to be friends if he cant accept that you are moving on. maybe deep down you still have feelings for him as well, other wise you wouldnt care as much.
    NATTY567

    Answer by NATTY567 at 4:09 PM on Nov. 25, 2008

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