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How do you know when you should walk away from confrontation?

We've all been in situations where we had to decide how to proceed, knowing the outcome of it will be based on precisely what we do next. Well, this morning I stopped on a block in my neighborhood and was angrily sending a text on my phone to someone. This late teen-early twenty something chick yells from the window, "Hey, stop standing in front of my f-ing door, you f-ing B. Keep it moving!" Once I realized she was talking to me, the amount of RAGE I felt was shocking. I thought a bunch of things @ once, all of them violent, but any of them leading to me ending up in the back of a police cruiser. Instead after a look of astonishment, I bit my tongue HARD and kept walking. Now I feel like I should have replied, from the ignorant sound of her, it would have escalated quickly. I've got 4 kids to think about and the last thing I need is an assault charge. Did I do the right thing, or should I go back around there to get this off my chest? What would you do?


Asked by Dmommy4 at 11:46 AM on Mar. 18, 2011 in General Parenting

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This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • YES you did and I take my hat off to you girl --- people do NOT know what one has to go through to even get out of bed each day. And to yell at someone in that manner is bogus - dont worry she will run up on the right one who doesnt are about taking a case. You did the grown woman thing GOOD JOB. And if you ever she her again I would smile at the bitch really confuse her.

    Answer by PurplWildFlower at 11:55 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • leave it alone.... she's probably strung out anyways. but if she continues to do this then I would ask her what exactly her problem is, unless she pays the bill on the side walk shut up, your not trying to take any of her clients.....LOL

    Answer by kkbird at 11:52 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • You made the right choice!

    Answer by tiddliwinks at 11:53 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • You did the right thing. Participating in her confrontation would just bring you down to her level. Feel sorry for her that she can't control her mouth. If you were on a city sidewalk, not her yard, you were in the right to be there. Try to control your anger issues, anger gets you nowhere. You can't think straight when angry. In anger, you say or do things that usually turn out to not be the right things.

    Answer by Kimimale at 11:54 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • Yes, you did the right thing. You're a responsible mother.. thinking about your children, & not reacting to an immature person. Your reaction shows that you are a conscientious person.

    Yesterday, I went through something similar and I wanted to explode but I didn't. Honestly it still bothers me but the best outcome happened.. i'm alive and healthy, who knows if that would have been the case if I reacted out of anger.

    Answer by Alexias30 at 11:57 AM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • I think you did the right thing. Please don't go back there, it would probably be a bad idea.

    she may have acted the way she did for many reasons. I don't condone swearing at someone like that, but she may have had reasons.
    you didn't mention if you live in a big or small town, or what the crime rate is. I live in a big town and I'm sure I come off as a real b*tch to many that see me on the street sometimes.
    I'm often approached by people who I just tell to get lost and don't ever talk to me again. If they do say 'are saying that because of _________' I just tell them 'yes, I'm a horrible, terrible, evil nasty rotten person, and you don't want to talk me anyway.'
    There's a lot of drug dealers, muggers and pick pockets in my area, so I have to be careful.

    I don't think you did anything wrong, but she may have thought that you were checking out her place for a robbery.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:05 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • cont- she may have cursed and insulted you to make sure you got on your way quickly. Who knows what was going on in her mind.
    but I would not go over there to speak to her again, she'll probably just view it as harassment.
    From what you posted it doesn't sound like she threatened you. But if you go back there, then you'd probably be guilty of harassing her.

    sorry again that she was unkind, but perhaps she's had issues in the past to where she felt she's been left with no choice but to act that way.
    If I feel the need to tell someone to get lost I myself don't swear at them, but I don't think anyone would accuse me of being a sweetheart either.
    I think it's best if you just congratulate yourself on being the better smarter person by going on your way and leave it at that.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:10 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • Leave it alone, there is no need for you to sink to that level. She is probably suffering from paranoia brought on by massive amounts of illegal substances.

    Answer by vishuz1 at 1:07 PM on Mar. 18, 2011