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Why does my husband talk to everyone but me?

I'm so frustrated!!...My husband can seem to talk to everyone but when it comes to me it is just small basic everyday stuff. He has been on and off the phone with his mother today planning a little get together for tommorrow, she has called me a few times telling me about it etc... The last time she called she said he is going to pick up the cake and pizza on the way.I asked what cake? She said he just ordered himself one (his b-day) He plans all this with her...He just called me about something else and did not mention anything!! He has no idea I talked to his mom.I know about it all and he did not say 1 word about it!!!!

I'm so frustrated it almost always like this, why does he exclude me from things. I feel like I'm on a need to know basis,like I'm his child not his wife!! I've told him how I feel about this numerous times and it never changes.

Aside from leaving him...what can I do or do I just have to live with it. Is anyone else in the same situation? What do you do?

Thanks for letting me vent!!

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 12:40 PM on Mar. 18, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • Tell him, ask him and if he don't realize it.

    Remind him, eventually he should get the hint. It is training all over again, don't you love wifehood.... :)

    Answer by KFree907 at 12:43 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • Leave him??? That would be bad advice.

    How about just saying, "Babe, tell me about your plans, let's talk about it. In fact, I'd love it if we talked more in general."

    Answer by Orionsgirl at 12:43 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • He needs to include you in his plans... Talk to him regarding this...

    Answer by AnuMeha at 12:48 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • Thanks ladies but I have talked to him about this on more then one occasion. I would think it would be normal for a grown man to talk to his wife about things!! If the roles were reversed I'm sure he would not be to pleased.

    I was just joking about the leaving him

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:53 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • I would for sure have a talk with him. He should have enough respect for you to discuss everything.

    Answer by justalady774 at 1:03 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • I don't blame you for being bothered by that. And I know it must be frustrating to have told him more than once and have things continue on in the same way, makes you feel like he doesn't listen. But honestly, sometimes we do have to repeat ourselves over and over and over again before they hear us and realize that yes, this really is a problem, and yes, we really are annoyed, and yes, they are gonna have to change it.

    My SO is pretty good about keeping me informed, but my ex was bad about it. I found that it eventually got the point across to him if, every time I found about one of his plans from someone else, I said, "Oh, really? Well, I'm glad someone had the courtesy to tell me. Thank you so much!" to the other person. Even if he wasn't there, the person I was talking to would let him know that they told me, and eventually he figured out that he needed to talk to me.

    Answer by wendythewriter at 1:09 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • Do you talk with him about plans? Did you mention to him that you wanted to plan a little get together for his bday? As a wife myself, I do most of the planning of parties, anytime my husband gets involved is because I ask him his opinion but if this is something that your dh always does, then the two of you really need to talk about his reasons why he omitts you!

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 5:28 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • Well venting is good sometimes I don't know what to say to this one I'm usually pretty good...Hum how long have you been married? maybe he doesn't think it's important to tell you and if you have talked to him about it and he hasn't tried to change then maybe you should do him the same way.
    This isn't a issue where you should leave him especially if he is a good husband and provider and good to you,,he needs help opening up to you and confiding in you instead of his mom, your his wife like you said and things do need to change. There is a reason he is like this, could it be that his dad was this way....check into it more....Good luck

    Answer by dusty1962 at 3:00 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • Just make sure he knows your there for him. Open the door and hope he walks through it. Was there ever a time where you may have let him down or he came to you and you said something that made him feel rejected or attacked? Just trying to get you to analyze to see if there may be some past issue he is holding on to that might make him reluctant to share. Regardless the best thing I think you can do is be non threatening and just try to be there for him. Tell him you spoke with his mother about the party and that you think it sounds great and you want to help. Ask if there is something you can do to make it easier for him. And if he says no then be prepared to let that be ok. Pestering him about not telling you things is probably counterproductive to making him WANT to tell you things.


    Answer by kayslay at 12:17 PM on Apr. 8, 2011

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