Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Am I over reacting?

I guess I could be called a drama queen, but in this instance I don't think that I was wrong. I came home from work yesterday, and I checked my cellphone to see who called. I noticed that my fiance had had a 40 minute conversation with his ex wife. Now in order to understand the importance of this, you have to understand the circumstances of their relationship. Even when discussing the children, they can't stand to be on the phone with each other longer then 2 minutes. They can't stand it. And that's not the kicker....He didn't tell me about their convo, until after I confronted him! I mean, I know it might have been wrong to check the phone, but do you guys think that I was wrong to confront him about it?He readily admitted that he would be very pissed if he had found out that I had an hour long conversation with one of my ex's, but he still didn't thik that he was in the wrong by not telling me. Am I over reacting?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:58 PM on Jul. 9, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • I'd be upset.
    momoflilangel

    Answer by momoflilangel at 1:00 PM on Jul. 9, 2008

  • You over reacted!
    -but yet again, there could be something going on and he's not telling you. Its hard to give up old flames. He still loves her.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:04 PM on Jul. 9, 2008

  • You had every right to ask him about it. But they do have children together. Did you just start yelling at him or did you make sure that nothing was wrong with one of the children first?
    DeannaDean

    Answer by DeannaDean at 1:09 PM on Jul. 9, 2008

  • It's never an over reaction to ask someone about a lengthy phone call. It does sound a bit odd if they can't talk for more than a couple of minutes otherwise. However, my ex has called me before (we can't stand each other) and as long as we stay away from certain subjects and talk in general we can talk for an hour easily. There is nothing going on with us and never will be again. Your situation could very well be similar and nothing to worry about but it never hurts to tell him how you feel and that you prefer he not talk to her without you being there or at least having him tell you he did and not look like he's hiding it.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:27 PM on Jul. 9, 2008

  • I hate my ex with a passion - but we have to talk about the children - and yes sometimes we can have long chats - we do talk about when times were good and how things went bad etc etc. We have even taken our son out together for the day BUT we never ever talk about getting back together. My time with my ex means zip. I love my boyfriend (my ex is still single) - he will never query my conversations even if he knew that I spoke to my ex. cause our relationship is so solid.
    busymum66

    Answer by busymum66 at 1:41 PM on Jul. 9, 2008

  • I get upset when my bf talks to his ex. In my opinion he offers her too much info. He can't stand her. So much so that if it were legal he would have her exported to some deserted island with no trees & 150 degrees. LOL Now I don't know how he does it but once my ex & i got thru the divorce we have become better friends then we were together. My BF & him talk, not all the time but alot. They sent stupid txt msg about game scores stupid stuff like that. maybe it is easier for him because my ex lives in indiana now. I don't know. But I don't get up set that they talk because they have a son together & his son is his world, I just get upset when they talk & he forgets to tell me. He will call me right after they hang up & tell me he talked to her. It's silly I know but it's something we do for each others peace of mind I guess.
    HelenStoner

    Answer by HelenStoner at 1:42 PM on Jul. 9, 2008

  • I don't think it really matters that they talked or what they talked about. You say they don't get along and he is with you now so what is the problem?
    Susan0976

    Answer by Susan0976 at 2:40 PM on Jul. 9, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.