I'm seriously considering leaving my hubby after 15 yrs of marriage. He's Bipolar and is medicated after 11yrs of begging him to get help. It only does so much and he feels like every thing he does is fine. He has put us in many financial disasters, and has made painful situations like our child dieing all about him. For instance, he was speaking at our childs funeral and when he was done he kept asking me if he sounded good and if he should be a preacher. I'm tired of him always trying to quit his job and trying to convince me that hes goning to be a laywer or a nurse or a police officer, ect. I've talked to him about divorce before and he thinks that if he kisses me and tells me he loves me that it will all be fine. But its not. I'm very tired and have two children to raise, and I work full time. Am I being horrible for just wanting to give up and be by myself?
Asked by Anonymous at 12:26 AM on Nov. 25, 2008 in Relationships
Answer by Anonymous at 1:54 AM on Nov. 25, 2008
Answer by Anonymous at 12:44 AM on Nov. 25, 2008
Answer by bonnie-jo at 12:46 AM on Nov. 25, 2008
Answer by infor2 at 12:57 AM on Nov. 25, 2008
Answer by admckenzie at 1:43 AM on Nov. 25, 2008
My exhusband has bipolar and it is by far the most difficult thing I have dealt with. I had to leave; I couldn't do it anymore. I also have a brother and a DD with bipolar, so I really know how it is! First of all, you would NOT be horrible for leaving him! There is a medical aspect which is significant. HOWEVER! There is also personal responsibility to take care of oneself and my ex did NOT do that and it doesn't sound as if yours is either. You have children you have to raise. With the death of your other child - to which DH will not allow you to separate from attention on him which is wrong (and I can TOTALLY see that taking place) you and your other children have significant issues to work through. You need to take care of yourself!! You cannot help your other children and take care of them if you are not taking care of YOU!
Anon 12:54 ~
Your answer brought tears to me because I KNEW KNEW KNEW my ex could and should be expected to be responsible for his actions yet this is the first time that I have seen someone admit this. I spent years struggling with "is it completely out of his control or does he choose to refuse to do what he needs to do?" Thank you SO much for sharing your personal story! I am touched.
Answer by Babylove76 at 2:10 AM on Nov. 25, 2008