Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Husband won't support my dream ...

Over the last year I have discovered my gift of cooking...( probably from having to stay home with my kids I had to do something to keep my mind lol ) ...

I have decided that I WILL open my own reastraunt. It would be fun and we could make money.

Of course since we didnt have that much money it couldnt happen yet...

But now my husbands dad passed away and left us almost $15000 ... I want to use this to start my restraunt .

My husband wants to split it up to pay for bills and to buy a new vehicle ( our car is always messing up ) .

i think we should do the restraunt, we will make alot of money and can pay for all of those things after. We are always short on money and i know we wont get the chance again ...

He makes me so mad that I think of leaving him. He tells me I am being childish and putting myself above him and our kids but I think he is trying to control me and just wants to make the choices for himself ...

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 6:45 PM on Mar. 18, 2011 in Money & Work

Answers (21)
  • $15K is very much money. I would think you'd need alot more than that to get a sucessful restaurant business going. Hate to be pragmatic but restaurants have something like a 94% fail rate so when you go into you want to make sure you have enough money budgeted to get it off the ground right. $15K alone could use up all of your advertising.

    Answer by Syphon at 6:52 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • If it's what you want to do then I'd say go for it. Sounds like a door opening for you. Me & my hubby will be opening a bar/restaurant in a couple of years. They have all kinds of grants for things like that.


    Answer by Anonymous at 6:56 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • Oh and just to add on...maybe your husband would take you more seriously if you wanted to go to culinary school with the money. There's is alot involved with owning a restaurant and I would think the first step toward your dream would be to go to culinary school and then go work at a restaurant. You see if you really want to be in the industry.

    Answer by Syphon at 6:57 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • 50% of new businesses fail in the first year. And it takes a lot more than being a good cook to make a restaurant run. Do you have any experience or education in bookkeeping, accounting, business management, etc?

    Your family need a vehicle they can count on, and bills paid off. I don't think your husband is trying to control you or deny you your dream. He is being practical. Your dream of owning and operating a restaurant will still be there, and if you're careful and work hard you can sock away $15,000 in no time. $15,000 isn't even enough to put down on a commercial property to get a loan anyway. Start up is extremely expensive and requires a LOT of capital.

    What about going back to school and getting a culinary degree and working as a chef in the meantime? That way you get to work in your dream industry without having to run the business part OR take the risk of start up?

    Answer by Ati_13 at 6:58 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • Restaurants are a risky business right now.. Many fail not because they are not good but people don't have the money to spend to keep it open.. My aunt had a restaurant for a period of time and it failed, she almost lost her home keeping it going.. Depending on your area, he may be right.. I know in my town, many have went out before they really got started. We have 3 mom and pop type places left the rest are all chain restaurants. Within a few months, their doors will close also :( It is sad...

    Answer by midnightmoma at 6:58 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • I'm not trying to kill your dream, but have you ever ran a business before? Owning a restaurant is more than just cooking. A business CAN make you a lot of money if you know what you're doing, but just as many small businesses fail as those that succeed. Maybe you are thinking of the product (food) and your husband is thinking of the business aspect. Either way, divorcing over a disagreement like this is not worth it. I'd suggest speaking with a financial advisor and a marriage counselor. Coming into a large amount of money can be stressful, obviously, and if you two can't agree on what to do with it, that is why advisors (financial advisors, marriage advisors) exist :)

    Answer by hill_star03 at 6:59 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • So much goes into owning and operating a restaurant. Many many things to think about and have in line before you even begin. Examples:

    Will you take out a loan, $15k is not really enough to open a restaurant?

    What type of restaurant and in what type of area?

    Will you buy or lease your location?

    Who will your suppliers be?

    How many staff will you hire?

    What pay and benies will you offer?

    What all licenses and permits do you need where you live?What are their cost?

    And many many other things need to be decided and handled before you even begin to open.

    Also.Like others have stated. Over 90% of restaurants fail within the first 3 years. Also, it takes (on average if a place stays open this long) 5 or more years to actually turn a profit. Restaurants are risky and take quite a bit of capital to open and keep running. 


    Answer by pixie_trix at 7:03 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • Have you completed a business plan? $15,000 is NOT enough to open a restaurant.

    Answer by meooma at 7:11 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • Grrr...typo in my first answer...should have said 15K isN'T very much money.

    Answer by Syphon at 7:12 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

  • I think your dream is awesome . . . . but, if you guys have debt, and possibly need a new car soon, you could very well be jeapardizing everything your family has. Most restaurants don't take off, and it is a long, long time until you will actually be able to take home money. On top of that, you will need to take a pretty hefty loan, and that needs to be paid back monthly . . . it won't wait for your profit.

    How about getting there another way? Why not write and publish a cook-book? You can put those profits into a "restaurant" account, and then, when you open, you can claim you are a published cookbook author?

    BTW, i have a friend to allowed her husband to "follow his dream" and open up his own business. They have wiped out all of their savings . . . . now he has no job and no business. It is very risky.

    Answer by ImaginationMama at 7:13 PM on Mar. 18, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.