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2 Bumps

If you're married, do you ever feel like a "single parent"?

Do you get much help from your spouse or partner?

 
AlisonAstair

Asked by AlisonAstair at 1:18 PM on Mar. 19, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 18 (4,810 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (16)
  • I work 40 hours a week. My husband works about 55 hours a week. As he works an hour from home, his day turns into 13 hour days. He gets home right in time to put the kids to bed. Then he usually has some things he needs to do for work when he gets home, so he doesn't help out around the house much.
    I know, there are some who would say that at least he has a job, but as it's not like he is the main bread winner (we are about equal) I'm not sure it's worth it. At least it's not for me.
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 1:26 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • I have in the past. Not just because my husband wasn't helping but because he wasn't there. We moved several times for his job necessitating him leave us in one state to go do his job in another. The first time was for 3 1/2 weeks when we had a 2, 3 and 4 year olds. Then in reverse 2 years later. I was left to deal with a 7, 5 1/2, 4 1/2, 1yo and two 10week old puppies for a couple months (had to wait to the end of the school year to move). The last was last summer. I was alone from April-July with 4 kids (10, 8 1/2, 7 1/2, 4) and I was in my 3rd trimester with no car (he took it with him). It was insane. I was living with my dad but he's disabled so I was still responsible for all childcare, housework and shopping which meant WALKING to and from the store every other day to carry food home for us. The most my dad did was watch the 4yo while the other kids were in school so I could take a quick nap.
    justanotherjen

    Answer by justanotherjen at 1:24 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • My DH supports me a lot & he knows I'm capable enough to take right decisions for my elder one though I let him know all about the kid....
    AnuMeha

    Answer by AnuMeha at 1:23 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • never. I am a stay at home house wife and do everything around the house and for my three girls. I do feel like a single parent even though married. Husband works and then on days off does nothing and even when comes home he eats and then off to watch tv while I do everything around here. So yes you can be married and feel single and ask why do I stay If I do everything any ways.,
    momindiana

    Answer by momindiana at 1:24 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • Unfortunately yes I do sometimes. My husband is a good father but usually on his terms. He doesn't always take the time to feed the baby or bathe and dress the girls. It's usually me who does it. There are some days when he will help dress them and even do our 3 year old hair but more times than not it's me. He does work full time though too so what can ya do. Lol.
    Bamzakarat

    Answer by Bamzakarat at 1:25 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • I'm not married, but this is a good question and all the answers are really honest which I love. BUT in my relationship with my boyfriend and I, I know I will do more as the mom because I love him but he's never changed a diaper or probably even fed a baby but we will learn together. I want him to want to learn though, I don't want to force it on him which I also feel a lot of other women who commented would agree on. We don't want to force our spouse to do anything because we just feel they should want too. I hope if you feel like a single parent that you are happy with life and if not you find a way to make the situation work better for you and your family. If this question is your situation.
    XOXO
    ohprettymommy

    Answer by ohprettymommy at 1:31 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • My husband is a diesel mechanic and works for a 24 hour mobile service, he works 17 and 18 hours days sometimes. Three days this week he done so. I definatley feel like im doing alot of it on my own. Because when he is home he wants to relax.
    jmgblair10

    Answer by jmgblair10 at 1:31 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • Single parent: yes. Get help: no.

    My husband falls into bed around 6am, snores till noon, takes at least an hour to drag out of bed, yells at the kids for wanting to spend time with him, takes a shower and leaves for work between 3 and 5 pm. He WON'T go out and about with both of them by himself because he says they're too much for him to handle. *rolls eyes* I could go on and on, but what's the point? You get the idea.
    Rosehawk

    Answer by Rosehawk at 1:31 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • I do sometimes and not because DH doesn't help or contribute, he does as much as he can, but he also works long hours. So I feel it most during the week, when he's not home until about 915pm....because getting a 6 year old and then a 14 month old bathed, homework, read stories to each of them and try to make sure he's in bed at a decent time and she's tucked in so she doesn't wake him up can be difficult. But I manage =)
    Mom2Jack04

    Answer by Mom2Jack04 at 1:31 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • I'm married and a single parent.
    My DH feels since he works, that's his 50%.
    Chloesmom1126

    Answer by Chloesmom1126 at 1:48 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

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