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2 Bumps

Wanting to adopt an African-American or Bi-racial newborn

My husband and I are interested in adopting an African-American or Bi-racial newborn. I have been looking into various adoption agencies, but I seem to hit a roadblock when looking online at agencies because I live in New York. It seems that most of the agencies that advertise on the net are not in the state and unable to assist me here. In addition, it would be really great if we could eliminate the middle man and just meet a birthmother wanting to allow us an opportunity to raise her newborn in a loving environment. I am not closed to the idea of using an agency; but it is very costly intially, even though you get most of it back on taxes. Most social services agencies don't really have newborns and we do not want to get an older child. I had two prospects in South Carolina, but I'm not sure if either one of them are going to follow through. One baby is due in a few weeks and the other is due in a few months. Either of these would be perfect scenarios because I would always have a means of contacting the birth mother in the future regarding the child. Nevertheless, I will continue to pray and ask God for favor.

Thanks for letting me share.


Thanks for all of your comments and suggestions. I want to make it clear that it's  not that we are against using an agency; however, we are exploring ALL options. In addition, my husband is deployed a lot and the process for the homestudy for us may be interrupted. I realize that there are programs out there to help with the financial aspect and we have no problem paying for services rendered. With that, also never know what's out there unless you look. So we are looking at everything possible. Culturally, there are many black teenagers and young women who are afraid of going to an agency and often consider abortion instead of adoption. We may end up running into one of them before she makes this decision and end up being a blessing to her and her unborn baby.

Thanks again.

Answer Question

Asked by Crimsonpope31 at 8:46 PM on Mar. 19, 2011 in Adoption

Level 7 (193 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • Have you tried Catholic Charities Adoption agency?? Being in NY Im POSITIVE there's a TON of unwanted baby's in the race you want.

    Answer by vbruno at 8:49 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • I will contact them on Monday. I think I remember going on their website but I didn't make contact. I will definitely look into it. Thanks so much

    Comment by Crimsonpope31 (original poster) at 8:51 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • I pray you get what you want :)

    Answer by June_Mama09 at 8:58 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • You are doing a wonderful thing and I hope everything works out for you.

    Answer by jnb71584 at 9:01 PM on Mar. 19, 2011

  • We initially tried to avoid using an agency, as a lot of people have. Some are able to form families that way, but it never worked for us. Every potential adoption situation we heard of did not result in a child for our family. You have to be really careful that you are getting advice from a good adoption attorney and not doing anything that will cause you a problem with the judge, like paying money for anything not allowed by law. Our lawyer told us that we were not to "buy her so much as a Coke" without checking with him first.

    We ended up using Catholic Charities both times, and we spent a lot less than many couples who "avoid the middle man". Our first adoption cost $5,000 plus legal fees, and the second one was $10,000 plus legal fees. Most CC offices only place with Christian families who attend church (you don't have to be Catholic). There are also age limits and other requirements. GL!

    Answer by Iamgr8teful at 12:20 AM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • I did adopt a black child and in general those adoptions are way riskier than other non transracial adoptions. For a ton of reasons. Anything worth doing poses a risk and a leap of faith. Oddly, I know both your states very very well. Feel free to PM me if you are looking for additional information. My son is now a wonderfully very active four year old. The road is long and filled with bumps along tge way. Hang in there.

    Answer by frogdawg at 2:25 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • Why is it that you dont want to use an agency? Is it that you dont want the expense? ( If you are AA or Biracial yourself, there are lots of agencies who will jump at the chance to match you with a baby). Especially in a state with laws as complicated as NY's, you are probably going to have to go through an agency or attny somehow. There will be at least initial expense.

    As the pp said "anything worth doing poses a risk and leap of faith". Many of us who wanted to be parents didnt want to pay the agency or attorney either, but it was what we had to do to become parents. It would be "really great" to just meet a pregnant woman who wants to give you her child but life often doesnt work that way.

    Answer by 2ndtimewish at 11:38 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • I hope it all works out for you

    Answer by Christmaslver68 at 2:29 PM on Apr. 1, 2011

  • new born yes

    Answer by GlitteribonMom at 10:34 PM on Apr. 25, 2011

  • Another dandy of an answer from GlitteribonMom. WTF??

    Anyhow, check out my group here on CM, M.A.M.A. (Making Adoption More Affordable). PM me as well. We just adopted twins 9 months ago.

    Answer by TALuke at 12:35 PM on May. 1, 2011

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