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3 Bumps

She says she is still his wife

A friend of mine has been legally divorced for 2 years now, they have 2 children together (6 and 8). Her X is getting remarried. Here is the problem, she is VERY religious, she was a virgin on her wedding day and was faithful their entire marriage, they were a GOD centered family and that was how she was raised. Anyway, she gets that they are LEGALLY divorced (she has no right to his stuff or money) but she maintains that she is still his wife in the way that matters, in the eyes of God. She has told the children that why their dad is getting legally remarried, God will not recognize their marriage because she is still his wife. She never speaks badly about him (ever, she says that he is her husband and she is to honor him in everything) but he is trying to take her to court for PA because she says she will never believe they are not really married. Could the court do anything about that? I mean, really our religion doesn't recognize divorce so to force her to tell her children that they are no longer married in the eyes of God goes against her religion. Is she wrong?

 
JLS2388

Asked by JLS2388 at 10:46 PM on Mar. 20, 2011 in Religion & Beliefs

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Answers (32)
  • other reason. Like, perhaps, mommy won't put out because we're poor? No, I don't think lying to protect their father in a split will make the split less painful. I do vehemently disagree with unnecessary bashing of the other parent. Tearing down you child's parent does nothing but hurt your child. However, telling the facts about what happened is not doing that. What reason would make a kid feel good about daddy leaving mommy anyway? No reason would really be good for their psyche.
    Bellarose0212

    Answer by Bellarose0212 at 5:07 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • So your original question was "is she wrong"? I think she is wrong. She is hurting her children by dragging this on like this.
    dancinintherain

    Answer by dancinintherain at 11:40 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • she sounds like a bit of a loon to me
    momofone725

    Answer by momofone725 at 10:49 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • He needs to get is mariage anulled from her, so she can quit saying that.
    dancinintherain

    Answer by dancinintherain at 10:55 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • I feel for her but if he gets the kids from her very likely him and the new wife will poison them against mom. She needs to keep her feelings about the divorce to herself and allow the kids to have both parents in their life. I feel for her sucks when your husband turns out to be less of a man than you thought he was but she needs to let it go and move on with her life. There are better men out there that won't leave first time something goes wrong in the marriage.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:49 AM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • I'm a bit confused, sorry, what is he taking her to court for? PA?
    Bellarose0212

    Answer by Bellarose0212 at 10:51 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • she is denial. And has a loose screw in her head too.
    babysavy9

    Answer by babysavy9 at 10:55 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • I don't even think an anullment is possible. There marriage was valid, not to mention they do have two kids together. Even though in her eyes that he is still her husband, the law is different. If he is legally divorced, he can remarry. As long as the divorce is legal. There isn't anything that she can do about it. She's definitely in denial. He's entitled to move on and marry again. I would keep the wedding small though or elope, that way she can't find out about it. If it is a big wedding, I can see her running in when the preacher says, "If anyone has any cause for these two not to be married, speak now or forever hold your peace." Don't give her that chance.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 1:25 AM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • She needs to go to here preist or whatever... she is wrong in her belief even the church grants divorces in certain cases. Sorry she is wishful thinking though why anyone would want a man that didnt want them I cant understand.
    ky_phoenix

    Answer by ky_phoenix at 11:28 AM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • Well thats NOT what the bible I read says about marriage and a man leaving his wife. But thats JUST my opinion. The courts wont even hear her. It would be a nuisance case. The LAW which TRUMPS what God and the bible says are what the judge cares about.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 10:49 PM on Mar. 20, 2011