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Did I Do The RIGHT THING?

The biological father has chosen to exempt himself outta his first born's life but I want him to pay child-support & financially be there for him... I filled for Child-Support & am now afraid of his retaliation since he wasn't there they day he was born because he was screaming & yelling at me while in labor...so he went to his newly pregnant girlfriend up in Maine & didn't even care about his first born son being born back in mass...
I know that he's made it clear to everyone on bad days that this is not his son but when something goes wrong up in Maine with his fairy tale life Connor's his...I don't understand how you can create a handsome lil guy & then walk outta his life just like that...& I am deathly afraid that with filling for DOR he's gonna come threw with some of his threats...
DID I DO THE RIGHT THING?!?!?!
Please help...we created a handsome lil boy outta the love we once shared but towards the end of the pregnancy after he asked me to marry him he changed his mind dated a another girl then cheated on her with me & another girl...
I feel that in my heart I did the right thing

 
proudmommy_0811

Asked by proudmommy_0811 at 11:01 PM on Mar. 20, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 14 (1,670 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (13)
  • Get that child support oder in place woman!! Tell the judge or your lawyer the threats he's making. If that guy thinks he can intimidate you he will try and if you let him your screwed financially. Weather he is in his life or not he IS responsible for support of his child!!
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 11:06 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • Ya you need to look after the boy & it's fine. He should pay the expenses for your child.....
    AnuMeha

    Answer by AnuMeha at 11:06 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • the other girl and the other baby have nothing to do with you or your child. if you receive child report from him then there is a chance that he will have visitation rights so you better prepare yourself for him being in and out of your sons life.
    TiffanieK

    Answer by TiffanieK at 11:07 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • My inclination would be to let this man drop out of your life and your son's life. He sounds like bad news to me. His behaviour is irresponsible and immature. He is not ready for the responsibility of being a father. He needs to grow up. You might re-think your own behaviour too, going back and forth with him, cheating with him, etc. Perhaps you need to get your own life in order as well. You have a child to raise now. Stop with the games. Find a decent guy you can have a stable, long-term relaionship with or raise the boy alone.
    judimary

    Answer by judimary at 11:13 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • judimary...i am more grown up than you think... to leave the person i thought i would spend the rest of my life with because he was cheating one me with two different girls...takes a lot since we were planning on getting married...i'm doing this for my son...i am engaged to a stable man who's been in my life for 14+ years & loves my newborn like our other son...i've never played a game with love i've seen what it does...i've seen it first hand heck my child hood wasn't the greatest...I NEVER WANTED THIS FOR MY BABIES or FOR MY LIFE...I AM STRONG & I WILL MAKE THIS BETTER NO MATTER WHAT...i'm gonna look out for my babies cause that's what a GROWN UP DOES...but your opinion is your opinion you don't really know me so I can't say much more than this...
    proudmommy_0811

    Comment by proudmommy_0811 (original poster) at 11:20 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • OMG......
    Get counseling and an Attorney.
    Wow.
    minnesotanice

    Answer by minnesotanice at 11:36 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • hugsDepending on your state laws he could sign off on his parental rights and still have to pay child support. No matter what he should have to pay child support, just because he chooses not to be in his son's life does not mean he can choose not to support him. Is he on your son's birth certificate as the father? If the answer is yes, then he is responsible. Sure he may want visitation rights down the road and you can prepare to handle that with a parenting plan, if it comes to that. I wish you the best of luck. Stay strong!

    sarchasmicangel

    Answer by sarchasmicangel at 11:57 PM on Mar. 20, 2011

  • You have a right to get child support for your son. He helped bring him into the world and now he needs to help support his son. You did do the right thing. If anything does happen, like threats, don't hesitate to file a restraining order.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:53 AM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • ok the thing is if he paying for this child then i think he should have rights to see this child or at least see  photos  of this child ever year 


    i know he refussing to see this kid as hisbut what if he changes his mind or ask for a dna test then want to see him


    if your ok with that then yes got fore it but if you do not want him back in your child life i go for terminating his rights

    feralkitten

    Answer by feralkitten at 6:36 AM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • IMO, you did the right thing. He has a responsibility to the child, whether he wants that responsibility or not.
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 8:13 AM on Mar. 21, 2011

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