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3 Bumps

Finally burned out and just want to cry

Last week my daughter got lice and her dad refused to go near her and help me treat her lice. I was up for hours at night picking through her hair for a few days. I did it at night because she was more tired and less active. He refused to help me, was more worried he'll catch it. Now my son has pink eye in both eyes and he's staying with his mom but refuses to help me out. I asked hm to watch our daughter for a couple days till it cleats up but he won't. So now my daughter has a chance at catching it. I am so sick and tired of their dad acting like this and choosing his mother over our kids all the time. He claims his mom needs him right now but when I called to see if he'll pick up our daughter from preschool because I was at the doctors and they were behind, he said he was to busy but I heard his dad video game in the background. Yes we are still married but his staying with his mom right now becuase she has some issues and claims to be scared to stay home alone when she has no reason to be scared. She's just milking a small situation into a major one. I don't know what to do anymore. It breaks my heart that my kid father pretty much wants nothing to do with them. when they were visiting him last night all he did was sit on his ass and watch TV while they got into everything and keep going to places they shouldn't.
I am sick of this and just want to cry. I have been taking care of them sick back to back and haven't had a break for a while. All I ask for is a few hours of time to myself but that is way to much to ask for.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:51 PM on Mar. 21, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • This isn't a husband or a father. The words SPERM DONOR come to mind. I'd cut him loose.
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 1:54 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • Then you'd tried, you've talked, you've asked, and now its your time to move on.. its sad for your kids but is HIS loss that he doesn't want to be more in his life.. I'm so sorry
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 1:59 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • I would tell him that if he wants to stay with his mom, he can move his stuff there permanently.

    When you get married, your family becomes your wife and kids. Parents, siblings and all other family are 2nd in importance.

    It sounds like he won't change. Time to give him one of two options. If he choses to call a bluff, make sure that you are ready to stand on your own two feet. If you back down, he will know that you will always back down and he is in control of you and all you do.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 2:03 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • I'm sorry mommy.. you deserve better than that.. Is he aware of how far your feeling have come?
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 1:56 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • Yes. He says I am making a big deal out of nothing. He always pushes aside my feelings and acts like I am being a baby over nothing.
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:57 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • I'm so sorry mama....I can't tell you to count your losses and leave him or anything like that because it's easy for me on the outside looking in to tell you what to do....if you think your relationship is worth saving and if maybe all this came along after the situation with his mother I would suggest counseling....there are some programs who counsel on a sliding scale and some if you do enough research that will do it for free....Good luck mama, I honestly hope everything works itself out.
    Lucky209

    Answer by Lucky209 at 2:02 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • So does "hubby work" ??? or just babysit his mom and play games with his dad????? If so then what does SHE do when he is at work???? then why cant she do it in the evenings too???lol

    Hubby would bring his *ss home or have his close on the front porch. and I wouldnt be taken the kids to see him.... he could get off his butt and come get them... do an activity with them outside instead of paying them NO ATTENTION he needs to grown up........ lol
    kkbird

    Answer by kkbird at 2:13 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • WOW - what an asshole. You got 2 kids honey, you don't need a third but is sounds as though he's already getting mothered plenty right now. Lice is SOOOOO frustrating and now pink eye on top of it - I FEEL you pain and remember going through all that stuff. Sheesh - I'd say cut your losses and lose that loser. Any man who can stand up and take care of his own isn't much of a man at all. Feel so sorry for you right now. Hugs
    8Tinkerboo8

    Answer by 8Tinkerboo8 at 5:19 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • Pack his stuff and leave it on the front porch. That's just sad and ridiculous. You are not acting like a baby, you are not making a big deal out of nothing. You have every right to expect help with the children he has fathered with you. He's acting like a child, worrying more about catching something then he is about taking care of his child.
    Raine2001

    Answer by Raine2001 at 5:45 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • my sons sperm donor hasn't seen him in over a year. this means i have him all the time but even with that. my situation isn't as bad as your. you deserve better then that and so do your kids. he's not a father he's a sorry excuse for a man and i'd take pleasure in kicking his DEAD BEAT ASS TO THE CURB!!!!!
    dansmom87

    Answer by dansmom87 at 7:11 PM on Mar. 21, 2011