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2 Bumps

Can anyone help me with my 11 year old she seems to think that she does not have to listen to me and can back talk me when I tell her to do something?

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Asked by dawnmflores at 3:28 PM on Mar. 21, 2011 in Tweens (9-12)

Level 5 (78 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Have you tried taking things away from her ? Punishments ? ...Like for instance if she likes to slam the door....take the door away. If she likes to talk on the phone...restrict her from using the phone until she can learn some manners. They are super hormonal between now and ...I dont know...Forever ! LOL ! Thankfully I dont have one of my own, but my neices keep me pretty busy with punishments and rules when they visit.

    Answer by Wish2Be at 3:30 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • Ah I feel for you - 11 is when it started for me. I tried all of the above and nothing worked. She's 18 and nothing still works - we are at odds all the time - I'm a good mom and it is so frustrating. Here'a bump and I wish you luck.

    Answer by 8Tinkerboo8 at 3:34 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • What are the consequences? For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. You may never stop the back talk, I'm afraid. But you can enforce the rules that matter.

    Pick your battles. And if she calls you mean, EMBRACE IT! Every mom should WANT to be the mean mom. Means you're doing your job right.

    Answer by gdiamante at 3:39 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • have u tried to take things away from her???? tv's, music, outtings w/friends, sleep overs. and explaining that she will treat you with respect before she gets any thing back. do it on a points system. add chores, dishes, separating the laundry etc to earn points back. ( just an idea...)

    Answer by kkbird at 3:50 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • Oh, do the norm and take the things she loves away and make her sit in her room with the door off the hinges while you're at it. Consequences that works for one child, does not necessarily mean it will work for another child and by the way, some kids could careless if you take an electronic away. And by not knowing the whole reason why your daughter is acting up, how long it has been going on, we can only give assumptions as to how to deal with her. I suggest you read Parenting Teens With Love And Logic (Author: Jim Fay, Foster W. Cline. Good luck

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 4:48 PM on Mar. 21, 2011

  • I wish I knew, mines turning 11 next month but thinks shes turning 25

    Answer by Kimberly71682 at 1:05 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • welcome to having a teenager...let her know its is not ok or accepted and that her behaving that way will have consequences as far as privileges taken away...

    Answer by mollysmom212 at 1:08 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • time for tough love. do you have a set of house rules? do you have her doing specific chores in the house? If not I suggest you start giving her a printed list of rules and consequences. Also assign her some daily chores if you have not done so yet. My 16 yr old got mouthy with me ONE TIME. After his dad and I tag teamed him he's learned what to expect in that regard.
    Break a rule, lose a privledge, don't do a chore you get fined out of your allowance~ I get paid for doing my kids chores. hehehehe they don't like having to pay me to do their work so now they do their chores in a timely manner. ~finals week and mid term exams are excluded so they can study.
    Also find out if something is bothering her at school or with friends, they can take their frustrations out with them on us mom's since they know no matter what we will still love them.

    Answer by Wyndi at 1:31 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • Your def not alone!!!! Good Luck hang in there!!

    Answer by catseyez at 3:05 PM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • Take everything away but her bed and clothes. She then has to earn her items back one by one by being respectful and doing what she is told. Explain to her that you will NOT respond to her unless she is respectful. Then IGNORE her when she has an attitude.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 5:07 PM on Mar. 22, 2011

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