Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

How did you know you were done having children?

I run into women all the time who say they're done having children. Is it a feeling you have that let's you know you don't want any more, or a deliberate decision that leaves you feeling like you have to fight urges not to try for another?

Answer Question
 
bloomsr

Asked by bloomsr at 8:43 AM on Mar. 22, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 21 (10,231 Credits)
Answers (16)
  • I just always knew I wanted no more than 2.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:44 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • I never wanted more than 2. I had a girl and a boy. The first pg left me with a year of PPD. The second one left me with bilateral Bell's Palsy, which still affects me after more than 10 years. We were pretty sure a third one would kill me outright.
    SelaCarsen

    Answer by SelaCarsen at 8:47 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • i just knew i only wanted two. and its just a decision of weather or not you feel you can provide for more or not and weather or not you feel you could handle more than what you have. i stopped at two and felt like our family was complete and i was done. yes i still go through times where id like another but then i look at my two and it passes.
    laura970

    Answer by laura970 at 8:47 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • I had a healthy girl, followed by a healthy boy. One of each was plenty for me.
    vbruno

    Answer by vbruno at 8:50 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • i have 3... i would LOVE to have another baby but I simply do NOT want to raise any more kids. I know my limitations. I wouldnt be able to give enough attention to another, we would be out of bedrooms, our lives are very busy right now and I dont think we would be able to comfortably raise another child.... not to mention the cost

    I think the problem women have is that they are short sighted... they want that baby... but that baby grows up and now you have another child. Yes the child would be loved... but it takes more than love to raise a child.
    sahlady

    Answer by sahlady at 8:51 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • The feeling hit me like a tidal wave. I just knew that my son was the last child we'd be having.
    I had the feeling after my daughter was born, but not as strong. Then not more then a month or two later that feeling went away and was replaced with wanting another child. I didn't like knowing that she'd be the last infant we'd ever have. Then after my son was born I was excited he'd be the last. I am enjoying his infancy a lot more then I did with my other two knowing he'd be the last infant. I'm excited now for them all to grow up and getting to experience every second of it. I like knowing I'll never be pregnant again. It's like we finanalized that "starting a family" chapter. Now we're starting the "Raising the family" chapter and it's a great feeling.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 8:54 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • When after i had my youngest and i just never got pregnant again, now i feel i am too old but i would'be liked to have 1 more but i am good with my 2 boys.
    jenn4443

    Answer by jenn4443 at 8:55 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • I am not at the point where I am done. I only have 1 child. I want 1 more and then I will know for sure that I am done. I am from a family of 3 children. It was way too much...and just 1 is way too lonely. I really dont think I will have any desire for a 3rd child...the though of having 3 children is beyond me.
    Wish2Be

    Answer by Wish2Be at 8:57 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • We always wanted 4, decided to stop after 2, but couldn't stay stopped. After #3 was born I was diagnosed with a pretty severe heart problem, and my cardiologist told me I had to be done. We has a whoopsie (abstinence works, til that one time, and then even a condom can't hold anything back apparently) and had #4, who we wouldn't trade for anything, and then we knew we had to be done - because of my health, because we had the 4 we originally wanted, etc. We just knew.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:14 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • I didn't until recently, lol.  I had a boy, a girl, another girl.  It just seemed "complete" to try for another boy.  I got lucky, got pregnant with another boy.  We do okay financially, not rich, not poor.  Adding anymore after this would take away from the children we already have and put strain where now it's comfortable.  4 is my great number, lol.

    MrsHouston47302

    Answer by MrsHouston47302 at 9:14 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.