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Help, pregnant with number 3 and can't afford it!!?

My husband took off the condom (I did not know until too late) and now we are expecting #3. I have a 4-yr-old daughter, a 20-mnth-old son. I have $70,000 in school loans and am looking for a job. The economy is horrible though, especially where I live. I can't afford the cost of childcare. My daughter will be in kindergarden in Sept. but my son and this baby will need care. I don't want to have an abortion and I couldn't give up one of my babies.
I didn't want to have any more children. I am so mad at my husband for his irresponsible behavior and for putting me and us in this position! Is there any hope? Is there anything I can do to afford this child? Any helpful tips? I am so depressed, I can't sleep.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:39 AM on Mar. 22, 2011 in Pregnancy

Answers (15)
  • Oh I feel that nothing can be done now....

    Answer by AnuMeha at 11:40 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • Sweetie, where there is food for one or two there is enough for an extra one, you can use your oldest hand me downs and breastfeeding will help with the cost of milk. Hope is the one thing you should never loose, if you are tight money wise, ask for financial help from the govt., where there is a will there is a way, best of luck!

    Answer by older at 11:42 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • look for state programs, I know not many people are thrilled with the idea of welfare but in this case you really may want to look at it. WIC for you, your 20 month old and eventually the newest addition to the family is always helpful. also look at the local charities and see what kind of help they offer. there are so many programs out there to help families get back on their feet.. and if you feel guilty accepting help just remember later after things get settled you can donate funds to the program that helped you.

    Sorry momma but remember, each new life is a blessing to those who can not have anymore children like myself.

    Answer by zoejains_momma at 11:43 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • Here is advice from me. Switch to cloth diapers, breast feed for as long as you can, get on WIC, and start selling what you don't need...look for ways to make a little extra money, and ask for an extension on the student loans.... Budget very carefully, don't spend money unless you absolutely have too..this means getting rid of cell phones, or satellite tv/cable. Don't buy extra of anything...make sure you unplug everything you don't use at night, except the fridge/'ll be amazed how much it will drop your electric can find all kinds of small areas to save a lot of money.... also check out this website, and do your own search for others... Good Luck, you can do it.

    Answer by kitchenwitch78 at 11:43 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • If you seriously cant afford if then you should be able to get state assistance.

    Answer by jmgblair10 at 11:45 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • You have two options. Terminate before it is too late, or start allll over again in about 5 years when this one is eligible for k-4.

    Answer by ObbyDobbie at 11:47 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • How do you not know that he took off the condom? Did he have sex with you while you were in a coma?

    What is with all these stupid anon pregnancy/birth questions.

    Answer by Acid at 11:47 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • This situation is not hopeless. My DH has $80K in student loans, I have $12K, we have 3 kids ages 3.5, 20 mnths and 2 months and we make it on $55K a year with me being able to stay home. It can be done it just takes planning!

    Answer by Bearhitch at 11:50 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • I agree w/ pps, cloth diaper (it's pretty easy and cheap), breastfeed(cheap just try to eat well), WIC, gov. assistance : food stamps, wellfare, just stick to the basics when it comes to spending, buy no name brands, I don't know where you live, but most states offer early head start for low income families. There are also a lot of organizations out there to help, with donations if you need clothes for baby or things like that. Try food banks. Budget carefully. I'm sure you must be overwhelmed but there are ways to do it.

    Answer by emmasmama2007 at 11:51 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • You can get help from the state. Medicaid to cover your pregnancy and WIC at least even if you don't qualify for foodstamps or cash assistance. You can also get help with childcare. Go to your county assistance office for applications and a list of other esources in your area.

    Answer by Nicoles2LilRams at 11:55 AM on Mar. 22, 2011

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