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2 Bumps

Are you in a manipulative relationship?

7 Signs You Might be Dating a Manipulator:

1. You're always falling short of your partner's expectations.
In an argument, the person being manipulated is often made to feel they are the ones at fault all of the time, says Casey. But what's really going on is the manipulator is shifting the blame onto them and detracting in subtle, hard-to-detect ways. They'll commonly say things like, "So we're going to have the big interrogation are we?" or "Are you going to get all emotional again?"

2. You often feel guilty in your relationship and are always looking to repair the "damage."
The manipulator is skilled at making people feel this way by saying things like "I spent all this money on this gift for you, and look how you thank me" or "You have trust issues -- why don't you trust me?"

3. You don't often know where you stand with your partner.
A manipulative partner often uses concealed or open threats to keep his girlfriend anxious and holding onto the relationship, says Casey. He might use statements such as "I don't even know why I'm here anymore; this isn't working for me."

4. You often feel like you're walking on eggshells around him (or her).
Maybe sometimes you're given lots of love and affections; at other times you're given the cold shoulder for no apparent reason, says Casey.

5. You feel confused in the relationship and keep questioning or blaming yourself for making your partner angry or frustrated. Manipulators are skilled at never being to blame for any problem in a relationship.

6. You're unhappy in your relationship at least 90 percent of the time.
This is a big red flag for anyone in a relationship -- whether you're with a manipulator or not, it's time to reevaluate why you're with that person.

7. You're anxious about telling your partner your plans or about something you've bought. If this is the case, you're most likely being controlled and manipulated, says Casey.

manipulative relationship


Asked by tasches at 6:14 PM on Mar. 22, 2011 in Relationships

Level 48 (298,202 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • This is a manipulative relationship this is an abusive relationship.

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 6:15 PM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • Sorry I meant to say this sounds like an abusive relationship

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 6:20 PM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • i would hate if i felt like that all the time

    Answer by mamawilbur at 6:20 PM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • Oh yes, that sounds just like my EX. When I read a book that listed those kinds of signs, I knew what was going on. After that, I planned and then left him. I was always feeling uneasy,not knowing when he would flip out ( he would have a tantrum for no reason, yelling at me or the kids and we would have no idea why.Then he would storm out of the house...)and I was always taking the blame for everything and asking permission to buy something,etc. He controlled and gave me "an allowance" for groceries, kids' clothes, presents for relatives, Vet expenses,etc. and I had to ask if I wanted to buy things for ME. And there was more.....
    ,I got a job to perk up my resume and eventually left. It was the best thing I ever did!

    Answer by minnesotanice at 8:28 PM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • sounds about right

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 9:28 PM on Mar. 22, 2011

  • boy sounds all too familiar

    Answer by Christmaslver68 at 9:59 AM on Mar. 23, 2011

  • Been there, done that. I'll never do it again, either. It is awful to feel that way all the time.

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 1:47 PM on Mar. 23, 2011